Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML
Today, my boyfriend was pleasuring me with his hands. After two years of being together, he was finally about to make me orgasm for the first time by himself. Just as I was reaching my peak, he orgasmed at the thought of finishing me off and stopped. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. All the magic vanished when I kept queefing every time he thrust into me. We made it about 10 seconds before he broke down into hysterical laughter and lost his boner. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "Uh-huh," "Not too bad," and "Yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is." Orgasm gone. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
osm1989_fml 6
He's the ****** Whisperer.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Grab his dick and say: "Longeeeer"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (134)
Pensu 12
Awkward. Hopefully he'll get better with practice!
prettygiirl13 3
You should have moved his hand to the right place
DivineSunshine 1
Dump him. You can do so much butter!!!!
Adula 14
Wow. You can do butter by dumping people ? That would be awesome.
RoscoePcoltrane 1
Well.... at least he's confident!
katyamaslova 5
I just hope you guys aren't teenagers.
22JB 11
Next time get rid of the pants. That or watch **** together and make a lesson out of it.
MorganBrown 8
I actually think that's a good idea lol
Chazyj 4
Some people just need a little bit of help next time he try's show him and I'm sure you will have one soon :-)
burntbeard 4
you sure he didn't say ummm in my dear? asking if he can proceed instead
tonijulie 20
You poor poor girl haha
aj94w 4
Sounds like EPD. **Excessive **** Disorder