Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML
Today, I had to clean up human poop that someone trailed through the store. Then, as I was cleaning up all the shelves at the end of the day, I saw that someone had changed their sanitary pad, took a new one out of the packed and used it, then left the used one on the shelf. FML
Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML
Today, at work in a library, I found a dirty diaper stuffed under one of the public use computer desks. Not only was it leaking, but it had been run over several times by a rolling office chair. I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML
Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to find and clean the poop. FML
Today, I work in a grocery store and a woman suffering from diarrhea somehow managed to get shit up and down two of the store aisles, then go to the ladies room and mess up the stall. I was the only one working trained in deal with bio-hazardous waste so I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML
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Top comments
FMLpuppy 3
And this is a daycare for children?
trellz17 19
A used condom wrapper? What the hell are those kids doing!
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Comments (210)
sunkistfitch 4
Condom wrapper? At a daycare? Dang, those 3 year olds are a little frisky after their naptime.
2RaRa25 6
I think the Health Inspector needs to pay a visit...or your local DHS...that's just all kinds of disturbing. Plus, if this is a daycare for young children, those things would be a great potential danger if a child were the one to find them, causing harm or illness.
sugoine 12
I think your boss is really screwing with you...damn!!!!
landcfan 6
Maybe OP was cleaning the play area outside, and those things were thrown over the fence, or carried by animals? Animals might explain the yogurt, although they probably would've emptied it. Maybe teenagers jumped the fence, and left the condom wrapper? Was the shit definitely human? Kids lose teeth all the time. The only surprise is they didn't keep them for the tooth fairy. Were they adult teeth? I can totally imagine I kid bringing a tire iron to play with, and a busy parent not noticing they took it from the floor of the car.
Briiyahh 7
Ok then
Britt125 16
That yogurt concerns me.... I mean it's 9 years after it expired. Obviously that place has not been cleaned well enough for the last 9 years (at least), or it's the same thing with somebody's fridge at home. The log of shit, is just a risk of having kids around, we've found them in our fitting rooms at work...buried in a pile of clothes. same concept, that sometimes you're too busy elsewhere to notice what people are doing and/or they've hidden somewhere out of sight. Kids also lose teeth. I could see how a condom wrapper could end up there. Kid found it and was curious, fell out of a pocket... tire iron isn't that odd either, somebody may have needed it (being a parent or staff member) and forgot it after using it or something. The yogurt is the only one I can't find a reason for. Somebody somewhere is not cleaning well enough at all.
amwinn 2
Must have a bad job cleaning last time!
cinnamonbuns69 8
Kids these days.
nrelavender 10
Rotten teeth and shit makes sense. Maybe even the yogurt. But why the **** is there a condom wrapper and a tire iron in a daycare?!
nrelavender 10
Hahaha, this is an amazing theory. The only problem is, why would there be yogurt from 2003 in the cabinet?