Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML
Today, I had to clean up human poop that someone trailed through the store. Then, as I was cleaning up all the shelves at the end of the day, I saw that someone had changed their sanitary pad, took a new one out of the packed and used it, then left the used one on the shelf. FML
Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML
Today, at work in a library, I found a dirty diaper stuffed under one of the public use computer desks. Not only was it leaking, but it had been run over several times by a rolling office chair. I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML
Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to find and clean the poop. FML
Today, I work in a grocery store and a woman suffering from diarrhea somehow managed to get shit up and down two of the store aisles, then go to the ladies room and mess up the stall. I was the only one working trained in deal with bio-hazardous waste so I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML
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Top comments
FMLpuppy 3
And this is a daycare for children?
trellz17 19
A used condom wrapper? What the hell are those kids doing!
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Comments (210)
batrob 7
I see the New Mexico isn't much better than the old one
PhishloverA 14
Should've ate the yogurt OP. don't waste
totalnewbeeee 1
I'd be mostly concerned about the condom wrapper thats disgusting
Eternal94 10
There a condom wrapper at daycare?!
PhishloverA 14
Ever wonder what you'll find next week when cleaning? Nice to know those little kids already know about using condoms too
COLDB3AR 6
..a condom wrapper?
TrollisMe 5
The next episode of Dirty Jobs is now centered at... this day care!
riotshields 4
That is disgusting. Daycares need to be cleaned more than once a week. At the day I work at, each teacher and teacher's assistant cleans his or her classroom every day after the kids leave. Extensively. Everything gets cleaned with bleach, we sweep the floors, vacuum the carpet, take out the trash... The fact that yours is only cleaned once a week is nauseating, considering the extent of how gross it apparently gets.
mosquito19 14
someone else's children are the dirtiest thing in the world
PoodleJuice 7
Obviously after dark there's a sick and twisted underground toddler fight club going on.. what else would explain the tire iron and 3 teeth?