No, I don't think they're talking behind his back, they're most likely talking on his right side, where they think he can't hear them.... Idiots, idiots everywhere.

Speaking behind someone's back is more of a figure of speech than a literal term. They're probably talking crap on him now that he's 'deaf'. ^ idiots... everywhere.

29) I'm fairly sure that #15 recognizes the term "talking behind his/her back" as a figure of speech.

Face palm.

Dang #29 see what happens when you try and be an ass. You make yourself look dumb.

15- you literally totally misunderstood the whole ******* FML

@15 Lesson learned: don't be an ass

Knowledge is power. Never let the little things or people bother you

-2, Good idea; OP- "boy, I sure wish I could attempt to hear any of someone's deepest darkest secrets right now, but unfortunately, I can't." (then OP just has to play the waiting game...)

So you're sort of an unintentional ninja in their presence!

2, you're right on point. I see a lot of blackmailing in the future. "You clearly said that I'm too lazy to pick up after myself, even though I do my daily chores. So you can do all of my chores and pick up after me, since I'm so lazy, right?" says the Original Poster.

Frenchies from Quebec. They are a strange bunch.

Every family talks about one another behind their backs, sometimes it's just parents being concerned but expressing it is blunt ways, sometimes it's a posse off sibling. Only difference is they're just doing it when OP is around because they think they can't be heard. So to answer your question, OP has a normal, but not very smart, family.

Totally agree. ^^

OP deafinitely needs to have a talk with his/her family!

Holy shit, almost 7000 comments?

YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO SPEAK LOUDER! OP CAN'T HEAR YOU. oh wait, he can? Whoops.

26) I'm just dying to see your reaction when you see perdix's comment count.

This may seem like a stupid question, but are you a real doctor?

34- Just look at Doc's profile. Find out for yourself. Don't ask other people.

Ajwc101 - I'm actually a 31-year old pizza delivery guy who still lives in his parents' basement rent free, eating Doritos and drinking Mountain Dew all day while I either play Xbox or post comments on FML. Either that or I'm a real doctor. You choose. :)

i SEE what you did there..no? okay

Well you most definitely have the attitude of House, so we'll go with doctor : )

Too bad OP isn't deaf. And by the way, lose*

Yea once again Android fail on the whole being-able-to-edit-comments option. I didn't notice it until it was too late.

13) It's alright, just be sure to proofread your comment before sending it.

It's the Internet. Didn't know we had to follow the rules of English here. I bet 90% of these "Grammar Nazi's" would fail at spelling themselves if autocorrect wasn't invented to spell it all correctly for them.

lol and here I thought the words of my English teachers would fade away. But alas they have been reincarnated in the form of a feline.

Ok sure it'd the internet i can tipe lik dis if i wanted 2 u hav a point. i will now tipe lik dis bcuz u said it didnt matr. But be honest here, would you rather have me type like this? or lik dis?

Listen be nice to the guests. Don't make me grab the squirt bottle.

21- Don't you dare. I will scratch you.

Well obviously, not lik dis! I believe people "banned" talking like that because it was too much added work for the recipient to read (obviously not much, but we live in a lazy society) and because people assumed talking lik dis, meant they were stupid and didn't know how to type properly. I wasn't hating on you FMLkitten, your comment just made me.... Think.

22 - You do and I'll grab the Supersoaker.

Roevera - It's the Internet? That's your excuse for your misplaced apostrophe in "Nazi's", right? And why you used "wasn't" instead of "weren't", right? Yes, I realise this isn't English class (as hundreds have said here before), but that's no reason to use poor grammar. What you say and how you say it is a direct projection of your own intelligence. You may have a 160 IQ, but if you don't write that way, no one would ever believe it.

23) I wasn't assuming you were hating on me, so don't sweat it. When people tipe lik dis, it doesn't mean they're stupid, it in fact, means they're incredibly lazy, you're right, we do live in a lazy society, but why should other people go through the trouble of having to decipher what one person is trying to say because they were simply too lazy to try? I also find it astonishing that you go through many years of hard work in school only to go on the Internet and type like you've never been asked to spell the word "you" correctly.

Guess what DocBastard, I can tell you right now, I never got an A in english class. In fact, I SUCK when it comes to the rules of grammar. That is why I wouldn't harass anyone because they can't tell the difference between 'there' or 'their'. I never claimed to be great at it, I only do what I can, so people like you can sleep at night. And even though it might not be grammatically correct, if you can read and understand it, it's close enough.

BZZZZZ!! Sorry Roevera, but you just lost your argument. Maybe if people DID harass you about the rules of grammar you would have learned them better. Besdeis, jsut becuase yuo can undersantd sometihng, doesn't mkae it coerrct. See waht I maen?

I just thank god they don't teach eubonics!

It really doesn't matter if someone were to harass me or not, it's the Internet. And stop acting like you're so much better Doc. I looked up your blog and spotted a grammatical error myself. For a doctor you're really being an asshole to a person who wasn't insulting anyone other than the grammar 'Nazi's' that insult others, and in all honesty Doc, I wasn't even talking to or about you.

Roevera - Who the hell cares if it's the Internet or not? We've already been through this. No matter where you are, your writing is a reflection of you. If you'd like to look stupid, feel free. You see, the difference between you and me is that I welcome people pointing out mistakes I make so that I don't repeat them and look like a fool. Please feel free to point out any grammatical mistake I've made in my blog and I'll happily edit it and then LEARN from it.

Fine, Internet or not, I'm paying attention to my audience. If I was writing a term paper, or anything for my career I would obviously focus a bit more on my grammar. Here, on FML, it really doesn't matter. But thank you for insinuating I'm an idiot because I put an apostrophe out of place. Although I don't believe a person's writing is a reflection of who they are, maybe in your case it's true, but it only shows to me that you're an asshole.

#55, I rarely get into grammar wars, your reply really ticked me off. So it matters if it's of personal benefit to you (eg, term paper grade), but not if it's other FML readers? Your reply is shortsighted and insulting. Careless language in one setting makes it harder to get it right in others (eg, the ones of personal benefit to you). Show respect for everyone you want to read your words.

#57, *but your reply See? Correcting your own errors is respectful. Please feel free to point out any others I made.

You must be thin skined if I insulted you from this conversation. Get over yourself. I never asked for you to read my comment, did I? You chose to. In something that personally benefits me, I'm asking for it to be read. You're asking for respect? Who the hell are you and why should I offer my respect to you. I don't see any respect from you either. Since when did using correct grammar became related to respect? The misuse of an apostrophe shouldn't disrespect anyone or 'tick' them off.

#59, Thin skinned? Not this professional editor. Here's how it works: when you make your words public, you are ASKING for them to be read and commented upon. You've JOINED a written conversation. When you're then careless with your public words and don't correct or accept correction politely, you show disrespect for the readers you have ASKED to read you. If you didn't want to be read and be commented on, why did you write? A simple premise of human communication is that you show respect to all readers of your words. If you can't (or won't) get this through your head, you will find public communication difficult -- far more difficult than OP, who is deaf in only one ear.

20-That's a tad excessive. I don't think anyone types every single word in Internet abbreviations. Comparing the mistaken use of the word loose instead of the correct "lose" to a whole paragraph of garbage slang is dumb because we still understood the comment.

Damn everyone needs to calm down. It's just grammar. It's not like it's anything important. If you mess up an apostrophe in a freaking Internet post, who the hell cares. If my writing reflects me as a person I'd rather be "dumb" than an arrogant asshole that probably doesn't have too many friends.

68- Try that one on your English teacher. "It's just grammar" That's like say I can typing like this and every single people could understood it well.