Today, while I was working at a gas station, a man came up to the register with his zipper undone and his penis hanging out in full view. I had to awkwardly hand him his change while trying not to look or make eye contact. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was working the drive-thru, a couple came through. As I was handing back their change they began giggling. I looked down to see the man's sex-nose fully erect. FML
Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML
Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML
Today, I was hiding in the toilets at work, catching a quick pee/phone/vape break between patients. Pants down, scrolling my phone, puffing away. Suddenly the stall door opens and my manager is standing in front of me, staring. The stall door latch hadn’t closed properly. Now I can’t look her in the eye. FML
Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML
Today, I tried to discreetly fix a wedgie while walking into a crowded store. Right as I yanked my waistband, the automatic doors opened and revealed a full line of people staring directly at me mid-adjustment. FML
Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML
Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML
Today, while working at a bank, I helped a customer who was making a large withdrawal. After I counted out his money, I asked "Do you want the strap on?" After a moment of awkward silence, as I realized how that came out, he smiled and said, "No thanks, I don't need one." and winked. Great. FML
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Top comments
HeyyShayy 15
You should've said something! Isn't there a law against public indecency?
anonymuse_fml 31
How does someone not notice that? Wouldn't it be cold?
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Comments (97)
TrippyEyes 16
You couldn't say sir please put your dick away?
duchessinky 11
You don't HAVE to serve someone in that kind of situation. You have the right to refuse service, tell him why, and call the cops. That's really not okay. If your boss tells you that you HAVE to serve a guy in that situation, then you go above him/her.
Kitty_Kat16 16
He was probably just drunk
Mooglefox 24
That is when you refuse service until he fixes himself
Mince_fml 8
*sam pepper's voice* It's a social experiment bro
mileymolly 8
OP here, I'm very non confrontational so I just pretended nothing happened and refused to look at him. After I handed him his change he noticed and zipped himself up. My boss and I aren't sure if it was an accident because he did look embarrassed when he got zipped up. I don't understand how you can miss that though. It is illegal but all we had for the police was a very grainy video. We didn't know his car, identification, or have a description.
Setareh23 34
He definitely did it on purpose. How does one go all the way to the gas station (and walk to the register, so most likely feel a breeze) and not notice their dick hanging completely out? Plus the fact that he just "happened" to notice it out, when it seemed like YOU did not notice it, is highly suspicious. He just didn't want to leave without seeing some sort of reaction from you. Seems like he's the type to get off on exposing himself to people in a vulnerable position. FYL OP
militarybrat 21
Just let it go. Especially if it was accidental, dont ruin his life and his family's life.
twinb76 7
And why didn't you call your manager and the cops?? You don't have to put up with perverts like that!!!
writerchic85 26
Today I walked around all day with my penis hanging out and no one had the courage to tell me about it. Fml
MrGibbs25 20
looks like the horse made it out of the barn door.
Dexter83_fml 17
Next time start laughing and say why do you have your little fella out ?