Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was, "I farted." Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got an F. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, whenever I get into arguments, I end up mixing up words. I was trying to prove a point by saying a type of chips, and was debating between Dorito chips or BBQ chips. I ended up saying "burrito chips." I said my friend would "sell me out for a bag of burrito chips." FML
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I found another comment online referencing, "Smoke weed everyday." With all due respect for smoking weed, when will people learn that "every" and "day" need to be two separate words in that context? This is seriously making it hard for me to focus on my work. FML
Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML
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Top comments
CryMoreFMLs 15
It happens to the... um... what was I saying... Damn, I forgot.
bonezisme 0
nice sounds like short term hit you bad
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Comments (728)
Scatnme2055 0
It never fails to see all the idiots on here saying how bad weed is and all the BS effects they have been told it has. Would be nice if people would research for themselves and see how harmless weed actually is. Its just like drinking. Do it TOO much and yeah it will mess you up. Not to mention you are just wasting it anyway. That is the losers you see doing it all day everyday. Do it once a day or twice even and you're fine. Been doing it over 14 years with a full time job and good life. Oh but i am supposed to be some failure by stereotypes right? LOL. Idiots. Smoke on!
wowthatsuckslmao 1
hmm , I wonder what color your lungs are
Petunia888 13
I totally agree!
steveakafranxy 7
376- black, purple, or out of scatnme's eyes, rainbiw
amor4evor001 1
weed doesn't make you dumb in the long run but for the time your actually high you do some stupid crap(: but IT DOESN'T MAKE YOU DUMB.
drawfromthewell 6
Congratulations! You are most definitely a moron, both for using an illegal substance and for arguing the intelligence you obviously don't have!
zachattack7731 4
Too bad because weed DOES make you stupid. Stupid people. Can't you see what marijuana does to you? No, because you're too buried in your own self-denial.
docscientist 10
I'm also buried in my biology degree it seems.
gcmest4ever 1
lol. golden. :)
brianjman14 23
What's with everyone hating us? Ok, we get it, you don't want to smoke weed, but that doesn't mean you should judge us. By acting this way, you're wrose than you're making out what potheads are like.
XxKaittxX 0
You're a douche bag.
marcxikk 0
I mean even if it wasn't that bad it's still illegal and promoting it isn't giving urself a good name. half the people are just trying to inform so others don't take the risk and end up being the unlucky ones that end up screwed. the more people do it the more people there will be to have that chance of screwing up. and be glad ur family is watching over you because doing drugs can break families apart
brianjman14 23
I know this sounds kind of horrible, but I don't really care if I break my family apart. We haven't been getting along for a couple of years. I have a deep hatred for my brother. It actually just mostly me breaking apart from my brother and my parents. They say they love me but I don't really care anymore. I can't wait when I get away from them when I go to college.
ElMundio87 0
cool story bro
budd28 0
ur absolutely right
mrhept 0
that's what u get for screwin up it life
CTVrhythmguitari 8
One of my best friends is a sophomore in high school, and next year he is going to college. He took all the enrollment tests, whatever they're called, and scored within the highest possible range on them all. He's an insomniac, suffers from incredible depression, has attempted suicide a few times, smokes weed and cigarettes every single day, and drinks hard alcohol almost as often. He's one of the smartest and funniest people I've ever known.
marcxikk 0
is there proof that smoking weed makes u smarter? no so stop connecting that to how well u do in school
CTVrhythmguitari 8
I had no intentions of this being proof that weed makes you smarter. I see it more as proof that it doesn't make you stupid.
5t3ff1k4h 47
494 - It's possible he could have been 'smarter' if he hadn't been smoking and drinking all the time. You can't possibly tell me it's been proven it has no effect on intelligence because there's no way to test how smart a person would have been had they not partook in drugs.
CTVrhythmguitari 8
572- I agree, I suppose. I guess what I was really trying to get at is that I don't think it makes you as stupid as a lot of people are led to believe, but I'm sure I has some sort of effect on your intelligence. I should have been more clear, I apologize.
casaco 0
Stoners unite
princessjazz 0
I think the whole subject of weed is disgusting. I say, "say no to drugs"!!