Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was, "I farted." Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got an F. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, whenever I get into arguments, I end up mixing up words. I was trying to prove a point by saying a type of chips, and was debating between Dorito chips or BBQ chips. I ended up saying "burrito chips." I said my friend would "sell me out for a bag of burrito chips." FML
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I found another comment online referencing, "Smoke weed everyday." With all due respect for smoking weed, when will people learn that "every" and "day" need to be two separate words in that context? This is seriously making it hard for me to focus on my work. FML
Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML
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Top comments
CryMoreFMLs 15
It happens to the... um... what was I saying... Damn, I forgot.
bonezisme 0
nice sounds like short term hit you bad
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Comments (728)
carmenm 6
it does make you stupid literally and you're also stupid for doing it everyday in the first place
LEGALIZEWEED 0
ABOUT MARIJUANA : Marijuana has never killed anyone . Marijuana doesn't kill brain cells the study that claims marijuana kills brain cells was done wrong . They tested it on monkeys using gas masks and suffocated them with smoke and no oxygen for at least 5 minutes at a time , what happens when you get no oxygen to the brain ? Your brain cells die . Marijuana actually helps promote brain cell growth but of course this study has received far less attention . Marijuana is a multi billion dollar industry which could help the economy . If legalized it would take a away more than half of mexican cartels money . Decrease crime . Marijuana makes people calm , alcohol makes people angry . More people die from caffeine every year than marijuana has in existence which is 0 . Marijuana is not carcinogenic enough to cause cancer and actually helps to prevent cancer . Soo you think it's a gateway drug well think about it this way if marijuana was legalized people wouldn't have to go to strangers on the street to buy weed who probably sell real drugs like meth and cocaine , since the drugs are right there to buy people are more tempted to try other things . Another example is if your dealer is out of weed and sells real drugs your more tempted to try something . Marijuana has an endless amount of uses from medical to textiles to fuel . GO TO NORML.ORG for the truth about marijuana .
omgwtftoni 0
trash
wowthatsuckslmao 1
you are ignorant if u think weed can't harm you.
LEGALIZEWEED 0
ABOUT MARIJUANA : Marijuana has never killed anyone . Marijuana doesn't kill brain cells the study that claims marijuana kills brain cells was done wrong . They tested it on monkeys using gas masks and suffocated them with smoke and no oxygen for at least 5 minutes at a time , what happens when you get no oxygen to the brain ? Your brain cells die . Marijuana actually helps promote brain cell growth but of course this study has received far less attention . Marijuana is a multi billion dollar industry which could help the economy . If legalized it would take a away more than half of mexican cartels money . Decrease crime . Marijuana makes people calm , alcohol makes people angry . More people die from caffeine every year than marijuana has in existence which is 0 . Marijuana is not carcinogenic enough to cause cancer and actually helps to prevent cancer . Soo you think it's a gateway drug well think about it this way if marijuana was legalized people wouldn't have to go to strangers on the street to buy weed who probably sell real drugs like meth and cocaine , since the drugs are right there to buy people are more tempted to try other things . Another example is if your dealer is out of weed and sells real drugs your more tempted to try something . Marijuana has an endless amount of uses from medical to textiles to fuel . PLEASE GO TO NORML.ORG for the truth about marijuana .
Petunia888 13
464- I was waiting for someone to say that! Thank you!
Got_any_grapes1 4
Actually, weed makes you happier, which is a fact, only because it eliminates 3000 brain cells a blunt. You shouldn't be persuading your friend into it, either. Peer pressure these days, smfh.
LEGALIZEWEED 0
actually weed doesn't kill brain cells . that is wrong because the scientists doing the study put gas masks on the monkeys they were studying and suffocated them with smoke the monkeys got no oxygen whatsoever so what happens when you get no oxygen ? your brain cells die . studies have shown that weed actually helps stimulate brain cell growth but of course that study receives little attention . Go to NORML.org . GET EDUCATED instead of talking about something you don't even know .
5t3ff1k4h 47
460 - I'm positive that's not the only study out there on that topic. Kindly do some research yourself.
JavIin 0
And I'M possative there are a **** load more too. :3 How about YOU do some more research?
Anyoniemous 0
Don't write a ****** FML about this. YDI and you should know it, anyways who smokes dandelions everyday?
daeubf 0
weed doesn't make you stupid! watch super high me. it's a good documentary and it also talks about the effects of weed.
urbanguerilla 0
Thanks for fagging things up #77, aka bill nye. Weed's fun, if you don't like it, eat shit.
Kushman10 0
all the anti-weed dipshits out there get the middle finger :) pot is awesome I've been smoking for years.
molliconeb 3
hmm that explains a lot!
zachattack7731 4
I agree
dropkik19 2
ydi u pothead
smhansen92 0
haha I hate when that happens!! it doesn't make you stupid though. horrible misconception