Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was, "I farted." Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got an F. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, whenever I get into arguments, I end up mixing up words. I was trying to prove a point by saying a type of chips, and was debating between Dorito chips or BBQ chips. I ended up saying "burrito chips." I said my friend would "sell me out for a bag of burrito chips." FML
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I found another comment online referencing, "Smoke weed everyday." With all due respect for smoking weed, when will people learn that "every" and "day" need to be two separate words in that context? This is seriously making it hard for me to focus on my work. FML
Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
CryMoreFMLs 15
It happens to the... um... what was I saying... Damn, I forgot.
bonezisme 0
nice sounds like short term hit you bad
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (728)
captainbj2 0
uh yeah, it does
IHateBoyA 0
Someone's a dumbass ^.^
Furby200 0
Been toking since age of 8. I'm 20 now. I'm attending a university and studying for Psychology--A's and B's are my average. Ya, people easily believe what they hear; it's reefer madness up in this bitch!
monnanon 14
Good for you but you didn't need the weed to do it. You were already smart, weed cannot make you dumb or smart or more focused or whatever, it is a temporary mood changer and an inhibition reducer like alcohol. People think they can solve all the worlds problems and spout beautiful philosophical rubbish when they are drunk or high. Also be thankful you didn't have the predisposition for depression or paranoia or the wiring in the brain for schizophrenia cause weed can be the trigger for all those things. You'll probably get or have had all about the things weed can "set off" of that in your psychology classes.
5t3ff1k4h 47
You've been toking since you were 8? If you're a teenager and choose to do it, that's fine. But 8?!
Furby200 0
Grew up in a tough neighborhood( gangs, dugs, the works). I was on and off-- Nothing long-lasting or towards a level of addiction.
BBLAZE420 0
hahaha that's happened ta me many of times lmao
mrst34 0
Weed does make u stupid and leads to other drugs. Everyone who tells u it doesn't, is in denial cuz they don't want to live in reality. They don't want to face and resolve their underlying issues. If u wanna make it in this world, stop abusing yourself and destroying your mind. Believe me its not worth it!! I'm very lucky to be here.
monnanon 14
As a non abuser of any substance I can catagorically state that weed does not make you stupid. It has similar effects to alcohol and alcoholics who are permanently drunk will do things that seem stupid because their inhibitions are lowered and their brain is addled. Just like weed these effects are not permanent unless serious abusing has been done and Im talking chain toking. And before I get the "it causes schizophrenia" comments, schizophrenia is always present in the wiring of the brain of people predisposed to it and it needs a trigger. That can be weed or a bad fall or an illness. It also does not always lead to other drugs. I group weed in the same danger group as alcohol and caffine and none of those should be used too much, even coffee changes your mood after a while but a person on coffee won't neccesarilly go over to harder drugs. I do agree with you about stopping abusing themselves because weed is really not needed. Its beneficial effects are placebo to some extent.
WildInTheStreets 5
it's not even that bad.
somerandomdude89 0
well it slowly kills your brain cells but hey I won't judge. to each his own :)
monnanon 14
Brain cells slowly die anyway. Look Im not saying weed is a good thing but it is no more dangerous than alcohol and should be used sensibly just like alcohol if you wish to use it at all.
PhillJFry 0
using sensibly is every day? only a user would state pot doesn't kill brain cells when every scientists says it does and yes killing brain cells does make you stupid.
spartan522114 0
At least you won't pass your stupidity and worthlessness onto future generations.
zxglle6382 10
Yes, the risks probably are exaggerated. but that doesn't mean they don't exist. Sure, maybe 999 out of 1000 people who do drugs will be fine, but if you happen to be the one, you're probably screwed. Some people don't see the risk, some think it's worth taking, and the rest of us don't do it. Duh. In every population, in every risk, a good many get away free. So of course there are going to be stoners who seem perfectly normal. That doesn't mean that the risks are lies. Can people just be rational? I'll never try to make someone's life choices for them or control them, but it's naive to believe either that drugs will always kill and destroy or that there's no danger.
Aaraeus 4
This is why only clever people should do drugs; so they can take down the people who. argue against them.