Today, while I was trying to explain to my friend how smoking weed everyday doesn't make you stupid, I forgot what I was talking about mid-sentence. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to give a deposition ahead of a trial in which my former boss is accused of fraud. I'm not a smart man, and I smoked a joint before heading out to try to calm my nerves. I got way too high and ended up giggling like an idiot through half the deposition. FML
Today, while giving a brief presentation at work, I blanked out on what I was going to say. I tried to make a joke and tell them I'd had a brain fart, but all I managed to say was, "I farted." Well, at least they all laughed. FML
Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got an F. FML
Today, my asshat roommate tricked me into eating a weed brownie. I thought it was his terrible attempt at baking regular brownies until it kicked in at college. I was so high, I started giggling like a schoolgirl when my instructor said "Dickens". Now everyone thinks I'm a retard. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, whenever I get into arguments, I end up mixing up words. I was trying to prove a point by saying a type of chips, and was debating between Dorito chips or BBQ chips. I ended up saying "burrito chips." I said my friend would "sell me out for a bag of burrito chips." FML
Today, my parents felt the need to lecture me about how people who "smoke the reefer" are a "waste of life" and will never amount to anything. I was baked during the entire conversation, and actually ended up breaking down in tears, because I realized they were totally right. FML
Today, I came home to my parents holding my marijuana. They told me that I had the stupidest hiding place ever, and that I was, "not only a pothead, but a dumbfuck pothead." FML
Today, I found another comment online referencing, "Smoke weed everyday." With all due respect for smoking weed, when will people learn that "every" and "day" need to be two separate words in that context? This is seriously making it hard for me to focus on my work. FML
Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML
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Top comments
CryMoreFMLs 15
It happens to the... um... what was I saying... Damn, I forgot.
bonezisme 0
nice sounds like short term hit you bad
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Comments (728)
samurninja 0
funny how this has 420 i agrees
vampire1618 5
eh my 90% of the students from my school proceed to college and it's one of the best in public school standards. That guy who was on House that now works in the government went to my school, now personally I don't but at least 70% of the students are part taking in underage drinking and drugs. Oh the irony. plus it's not much worse than legal smoking or drinking. I'm defending it because 1. Weed isn't all that bad and 2. most of my friends do it haha
5t3ff1k4h 47
If all your friends jumped off a bridge, telling you it's great fun, would you still do it knowing there's a risk involved?
akichan15 5
maybe it isn't the weed and you're just stupid.
Playful1985 9
It also creates paranoia, enhances the extreme symptoms of mental illness, and if used for a decade or more can create mental illness.
Koonkilla 0
When a law is unjust it is your job to break it-ben franklin (fuel for the entire civil rights argument) I hope everybody realizes that rome, egypt, mesopotamia, the middle east, and the united states were all built on the production of hemp/cannabis.
mrhappyhour 0
been there, done that
aims14 0
you implying you're a druggie?
nonymous1998 0
even if it doesn't cause stupidity, you deserve it for being dumb enough to do drugs in the first place.
trixy81 10
doofus! why do you smoke weed!?
bluejay22 4
you are an idiot...
MrBobby_fml 7
Predictable, if ill informed, responses...