Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was walking to my friend's Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML
Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML
Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML
Today, I bought fifteen bags of candy for the trick-or-treaters. I sat outside with a bowl of candy the whole night. Only one person came. FML
Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML
Today, I dressed up as my friend for Halloween. He has a very distinct style and I thought my costume was pretty clever. When he saw me, he said he had never been so offended in his entire life, and now I feel like a complete asshole. FML
Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML
Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML
Today, my sister is dressing up as a nerd for Halloween. She's using my clothes for the costume. FML
Today, it's the Halloween after my wife and I moved into a predominantly Muslim neighborhood. We waited for three hours with a big bowl of Snickers, before the restaurant owner downstairs told us no one would come because Muslims don’t celebrate Halloween. FML
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Top comments
GSP101 0
Put (fake) blood on your self and say you killed your evil twin.
rubyjames 3
Go two houses ahead of him? No, I see the obvious solution here: you're going to have to murder your neighbor.
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Comments (91)
KiddNYC1O 22
It's those ******* underwear over your pants that's scaring them...
MURPHYCHACHO 5
What kind of ******** turns down a kid for candy??
granpa_haribo 13
Wear HIM as a costume
kiral_fml 2
This is NOT an FML, this is a IHABD (I had a bad day)
malignantmegan 3
Honestly most houses refused me and I didn't care it was just fun running around with my little brother. I got maybe 40 pieces. Which my brother got 5 times the amount. And most of the houses were too scary for him to walk alone so if you have enough money to make me have to walk up there you better fork some over. But that's just me. And my brother is 11 and says he wants a Halloween party next year so it isn't like I'm still doing it for me
Crysiscore 0
Troll neighbor.
Ecklcakes 15
I think 14 is the absolute limit personally. That was the last time I did it. I'm now 17 and help my parents hand out candy.
xckylexc 0
Go to a different neighborhood?
DonQuixote158 6
YDI because hipster
DonQuixote158 6
That would make him a pansy