Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking to my friend's Halloween themed birthday party in my zombie costume. Apparently, my crazy coke addicted neighbor found the costume too realistic. He tackled me. FML
Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML
Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML
Today, I bought fifteen bags of candy for the trick-or-treaters. I sat outside with a bowl of candy the whole night. Only one person came. FML
Today, my company had a Halloween party. I was so excited seeing as our company never does anything, so I pulled out all the stops with my costume. I was the only one who got dressed up. FML
Today, I dressed up as my friend for Halloween. He has a very distinct style and I thought my costume was pretty clever. When he saw me, he said he had never been so offended in his entire life, and now I feel like a complete asshole. FML
Today, a kid came trick or treating to my house. When I told him Halloween was nearly two weeks ago, his reaction was to savagely kick me in the shin and run off screaming obscenities. This is the same kid who broke down in tears when I gave him candy on the real Halloween. FML
Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML
Today, my sister is dressing up as a nerd for Halloween. She's using my clothes for the costume. FML
Today, it's the Halloween after my wife and I moved into a predominantly Muslim neighborhood. We waited for three hours with a big bowl of Snickers, before the restaurant owner downstairs told us no one would come because Muslims don’t celebrate Halloween. FML
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Top comments
GSP101 0
Put (fake) blood on your self and say you killed your evil twin.
rubyjames 3
Go two houses ahead of him? No, I see the obvious solution here: you're going to have to murder your neighbor.
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Comments (91)
tweetypie 18
I live in NYC and we don't go trick or treating at houses, we have to go to stores. I'm 16 and I had fun with my friends trick or treating. To me, age doesn't matter. Free candy is free candy.
kittenelaine 0
You're either too old to be trick or treating, or too young to be on this website.
smileygirl1985 0
If your old enough to know how to post a fml then your probably too old to go trick or treating get a job and buy your own candy
JHandAC 4
At least you went Trick-Or-Treating. Connecticut cancelled it and I didn't go *useless profile pic costume :(*
bubo_fml 11
No candy? Shit in their Jak-0-lanturns!
theressarina 2
YDI. You're too old to Trick or Treat. Our house only gives Dum-Dums to the older kids, and good stuff like snickers to the kids.
mj_ok 9
Aww!! Everyone deserves candy, You should of changed your costume.
GeeBustos 0
Tell Them To Suck Your D*** & Take All Their Candy!
chele2382 5
If you are old enough to get on FML.com and complain that you didn't get candy then you are old enough to walk yourself to the mini-mart get a candy bar. YDI
sftbllfrk13 3
YDI. if you're old enough to post fml's, youre too old to be complaining about not getting any candy from trick or treating anyways.