Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bought fifteen bags of candy for the trick-or-treaters. I sat outside with a bowl of candy the whole night. Only one person came. FML
Today, I had to tell all the trick-or-treaters that I'd run out of candy. I'd actually bought about $50 worth of candy, but managed to eat all of it by myself, sitting alone in my apartment, exactly like last year. FML
Today, I spent over an hour decorating my house for trick or treaters. I never got one person at my door because I forgot to unlock my gate. FML
Today, I dressed up as a ghost and walked down the street to meet my friends. A dog somehow got loose and decided my "flowy" costume was the perfect chew toy. I spent the evening dodging an overly enthusiastic dog and getting barked at. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend to get a bunch of candy for our first Halloween at our new house, so she got $60 worth. We got into an argument about who was going to give it out. It’s now 9 p.m. No one came to our door all night. FML
Today, one of my neighbors dressed up in the exact same costume as me. Every house I go to refuses to give me candy because my neighbor has already been there. FML
Today, I was handing candy to a little boy who was trick or treating by himself. He was small enough to grab the candy and run past me into my house. I've been searching my house for two hours and still can't find him. I'm afraid to go to sleep. FML
Today, I spent over $160 and 2 hours preparing for a Halloween party I was throwing. The only person who showed up was my sister, who helped me decorate. FML
Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed as a pirate. Someone complimented me on how convincing the fake teeth were that I had on for my costume. I wasn't wearing fake teeth. FML
Today, a kid came Trick-or-Treating at my house. When I told her it was still one more day until Halloween, and that I didn't have any candy, she wound-up her fist, punched me in the groin, and ran off laughing. FML
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Top comments
suboy 10
Was your light on???
gjortx 2
Well that sucks. At least you can eat the candy. My house got wiped out of all the candy by all the trick r treaters. Maybe next year.
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Comments (121)
gjortx 2
Well that sucks. At least you can eat the candy. My house got wiped out of all the candy by all the trick r treaters. Maybe next year.
tattoo88 4
#1 your house got that many kids, or your kids ate it lol?
balognasammich 2
More candy for you, OP! Eat up!
RaggleFrock 13
We didn't have a single trick or treater either, because it rained all night.
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
I didn't get to trick or treat because the hurricane messed everything up where I live.
emag_eht 18
20- #1 said by trick or treaters :/ I live in an apartment so I never hand candy out but I think OP should have at least put a small sign saying "candy here" or the door or fence.
davestrider 0
#49 You don't just put up a sign that says "candy here" even during Halloween. That would be luring the children to your house. No one would come anyway. Who wants candy from an obvious pedophile?
MizzErikaHart 8
Ummm, on Halloween it's pretty safe to follow "candy here" signs...
StalkerChick 13
We usually just turn our porch light on.
Neorecon19 18
Thank goodness all the store put that candy on sale! Diabetes away!
suboy 10
Was your light on???
iseyixes 18
Maybe just a bad neighborhood and the kids go to nicer houses in a better part of town. That's what we did when I was younger.
soccerchick800 10
At least u have $30 of candy to pig out on now!
annie_nk 23
I wonder the same thing. It's like an unspoken rule that porch light on generally means candy.
gc327072 31
13- yea, where I live, we have TONS of kids come.
LiterOfCola 16
I hope that was a typo gc
makowiec 11
Don't worry, my mum bought eight bags of lollies and no one came to my house either :/
mitchymitch97 0
No one came to my house either......
Katie_9078 8
Hm my mom usually buys loads of candy too.. We get most of it gone but there's usually a bag or half of one sometimes..
gorilla69 3
More candy for you then
MormonPornstar 7
Right? 1. You have a sweet pirate costume. 2. You have $30 worth of candy 3. You escaped all the irritating kids 4. You have a sweet pirate costume
cheer4everever 0
Well Halloween could've been canceled where you live. It's canceled in most parts of Connecticut.
HairyPunisher 27
Way to make this about you.
babe7260 30
Why?
jburd45 1
^ where have you been?
dashizam 10
I'm thinking that OP got the trick or treat times wrong. Most places around here had it Sunday.
emag_eht 18
5- OP lives in Alabama. It's not even close to Connecticut so that really couldn't be it.
Marrach 7
ldpHdjUskRhfRfjsIjdCeidAodNjeiE SkfAlcNksDjsY Figure It Out.
KiddNYC1O 22
21- Because of the squirrel in Spongebob Squarepants.
laurenlovesjb 20
Yes my township postponed trick or treating, and I just live in western PA.
whosindahouse 9
52- Hurricane Sandy
RoperGirl203 9
8 - dafuq.
PokemonLove993 17
it was postponed for us in CT and now they're saying possibly a snowstorm this week so no Halloween :(
Katie_9078 8
Figure what out?? :l
mbuck87 19
LOL you're the neighbourhood creeper!
MrBubblez98 13
Was that supposed to be funny? And judging by your picture, you're quite the creep too...
MormonPornstar 7
I've got friends who look like him. It's just their style. My buddy hasn't washed his hair in 3 years, stapled stuff to his forehead, and drops cliffs when we snowboard to see if the landing is safe. Just cuz he looks creepy it weird, doesn't mean he is. That's like saying your suit and tie means you're a stingy, stuck up asshole.
kittycat2007 18
Next time mention to neighbors that you"ll have candy. They will come.
MadameMerle 11
I don't know how he did it, but it was probably your dog's revenge for the parrot-costume
kerrywoodwins20 2
Look at the bright side, you didn't contribute to the obesity problem in America's youth. Glass is half full.
onlychildFTW 34
That is a good thing!
Posthuman 26
But if we aren't fat, we aren't American! Everybody knows that!
BlowinChronic 18
Perhaps OP is America's youth and now has a $30 bag of candy... That's contributing to American obesity!
LovesSushi 25
For some reason this makes me very sad. But on the bright side you now have a costume for next year!