Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML
The bed is lava
Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML
Hello from the other side
Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML
Hell no!
Today, my wife opted for a home birth with a nurse and her mother. Her mother is such a baby-feral, men-are-bastards, hippie feminist dragon that not only did she yell at me when I tried to be in the room, she has now pushed me out of the house. I ended up sat in my car with only one shoe and no phone. FML
Today, my wife's water broke so I drove her to the hospital. After 16 hours without labor, I went home to get a little sleep. Four hours later I got the call and ran outside to find that my car was towed from my parking space. FML
Nervous
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Double standards
Today, my husband was offered, and accepted, pain relief during an ultrasound on his scrotum, and I’m sat here remembering how I wasn’t offered any pain relief at all while birthing a 9lb baby, because I was left in the waiting room so long they told me it was too late for an epidural. FML
Today, I drove to the hospital to see my newborn. I went to the room, picked him out of the crate and held him. Then I heard the toilet flush and saw a woman who I didn't know come out. She screamed. My wife was in the room next door. FML
Slight hiccup
Today, a customer at work was having hiccups, so I suggested she should try to hold her breath for a while. Ten minutes later, she's talking to my manager about how I wanted her to "kill herself because of her severe medical condition." FML
Help!
Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML
Top comments
nerdyninjarobot 5
Holy shit that bitch needs to be fired. That is so out of line!
SolarLunix 21
Super unprofessional. Report her!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (233)
Etweens96 25
That's out of line! I'd tell the front desk. But congratulations on your newborn! Many blessings!
Smithicus1991 6
that's a little ****** up
FalloutScrolls 25
That is absolutely horrific! Report that bitch, like NOW!
AlGrabIt 12
what is with these women saying disgusting things like this about babies? this makes me sick!!!!! congratulations on your baby, and **** that nurse!!!
DArthurVaderian 18
Where there's smoke, there's FIRED
maxxwell9 9
Not surprised coming from a women in BC most of them act like a bitch
jezka374 15
Report the bitch. I do not believe someone who could say that should have anything to do with bringing a new life into the world! What a ****!
Ben12345_fml 18
Bwahahah
MRSwick2525 23
You're an idiot. What reason could you possibly have to laugh at any part of this situation!?!?!? What this Nurse said was absolutely horrid and completely distasteful and you laugh!!!!?
silverkaast 9
You can sue the hospital now. kudos.
janfleury 19
Report them. That is way out of line. They both need to be looking for another job. I Damn sure would not let them near your wife and unborn baby again.