Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Just can't get enough
Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
In this economy?
Today, the good news is that my girlfriend is pregnant. The bad news is that twins run in her family. Worse, so do triplets, and I just recently lost my job. FML
Genius
Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, I had to convince my husband that I'm not having an affair all because I refused to have sex with him. Apparently the fact that I gave birth to our twins 10 days ago isn't a good enough reason to turn him down. FML
Today, I announced to my fiance that I was pregnant with twins. He immediately called off the engagement, furious at me because we "agreed to only have one child". Sorry my embryo decided to split in two. FML
Today, my fiance told me he thought it was time that we started to see other people. I'm six months pregnant with his baby. FML
Top comments
Thabb 0
Ehhh, your hand isn't THAT bad.
ADayToPierceTheV 0
sounds reasonable
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Comments (442)
TrollisMe 5
Your girl has balls? Well that IS an FML...
americiato 2
you both need sex ed. op women don't have balls, and your wife need to know its practically impossible to get twins with sex during pregnancy xD
Sheilatakeabow 0
Actually, if she doesn't want sex there's not a lot you can do so deal with it.
Ephixa 0
Well do you?
MA_COTA 0
ur wife is an idiot
dreiv330 0
'actually have the balls'?
TheSithAssassin 15
That doesn't sound like gaul, it sounds like she doesn't understand how reproduction works.
redoxy_fml 0
Thar she blows!!!
Sharnaaaaa 0
tell me half of these people actually know that it's not possible to get another baby
juniperlove_11 0
It's highly unlikely but still possible.
babyblue666 1
is she stupid. get her a book on pregnancy or go to one of her appointments and bring it up to the doctor