Anonymous
United States
Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Dr Pepper
I'm not sad. Or am I?
Today, to protect me from the 'bad people' out there, my mom bought some pepper spray. While trying to test it, I accidentally sprayed myself in the eyes. Now, every person I meet asks me what I've been crying about. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Fast response
Today, my mom bought me pepper spray in case anyone tried to "mess" with me. I put it in my purse. Later, a guy snatched my purse before I even had the chance to take out the pepper spray. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML
Username
Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML
Anonymous
Stevenson Ranch, United States
Play Stupid Games, Win Stupid Prizes
Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, after lunch with my frail, disabled, 87-year-old father, I reached into my purse for lipstick. I didn't recognize the cute cylinder I pulled out, but thinking it was a flashlight, I pressed the little button, spraying my dad and myself in the face with pepper spray. FML
Anonymous
United States
Gotcha good
Today, tired of my roommate’s constant stealing of my food, I decided to get back at him by hiding a small amount of hot sauce in his sandwich, thinking it would be a funny prank. When he took a huge bite, he immediately started choking and running to the bathroom. I later found out he's allergic to spicy food. FML
joey
Zapped
Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML
Anonymous
Malaysia
Today, someone switched my hairspray with bug spray when I didn't notice. I used it. FML
Anonymous
Brighton, United Kingdom
Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML
Top comments
flockz 20
dumbass nice job spraying yourself.
karmennn 0
that was stupid. ydi for spraying yourself with pepper spray...expired or not
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Comments (302)
flockz 20
dumbass nice job spraying yourself.
worldcupcheer17 0
even though it's expired it'll still probably hurt like a bitch you're dumb ydi.
xXshadowrollerXx 6
You're* smart too! :)
FiestaInMyPants 8
Wrong comment, 19..
6tori6 5
dumbass! you aren't even supposed to point pepper spray at yourself, let alone purposely spray yourself.
yummycupkake 0
that's like pointing a gun at yourself making sure there aren't any bullets in it lol
xXshadowrollerXx 6
26 - I realized. The first time my comment has ever been buried to the depths of hell. It's a horrible feeling.
6tori6 5
Then maybe you shouldn't be Grammar Nazi. YDI. Its really annoying, and I will let you know that I thumbed your comment. Down.
saaaalt 4
59 I take it you really didn't like your fifth grade English teacher. No need to be genuinely upset…
olpally 33
what a ******* retard u are op... lmao at u right now... just ******* stupid!!
walkingtaco 0
funniest shit i've heard all day.
salvorican 24
Don't worry 76. One of my comments had gotten over 200 thumbs down before. I didn't give a shit lol. Don't feel bad buddy
YayFlameWarz 9
Do you look down the barrel of a shotgun to? Idiot.
opendoorclosed 8
Oh really it worked!? What a surprise!!
raebeglan 7
i love your picture#1!!!
flockz 20
i tip my hat to you then my fair lady thank you for that kind gesture. have a nice day! :]
6tori6 5
118- how does my 5th grade teacher at into this?
6tori6 5
*play not at:P
kidtoronto 5
GN
meliesFML 0
ouch. blonde moment.
whiteboy7thst 2
or high moment?
Tcaret300 12
I think that thumbs down are just thumbs up that didn't get enough attention as a child... but yeah, maybe even a drunk moment lol.
calebobadiah 0
or a new low moment.
HoBoJo62 0
it's just a dumbass moment.
SHORTstopp99 5
haha
chili10 18
not even blondes are dumb enough to pepper-spray themselves in the eyes.
wrigleys 4
I agree with #20, I've done some fairly similar things, no were near that bad mind.
JoeTheMan12 0
why in the world would you test it out on yourself?? at least try it out on your friend first :P
karmennn 0
that was stupid. ydi for spraying yourself with pepper spray...expired or not
ImaWiseGuy 5
haha, you really assumed that since the can of "pepper spray" expired that it just stopped being hot? you should be the poster child for birth control..
ImaWiseGuy 5
haha, you really assumed that since the can of "pepper spray" expired that it just stopped being hot? you should be the poster child for birth control..
yummycupkake 0
^ i don't get the last part D:
jemama 1
86 - I think it's along the lines of "Use birth control or you may end up with a child this thick." ...
atthegates 0
wow 86. just wow.
allthatremains25 0
it's okay 86, I don't understand it either. it's a stupid expression and has nothing to do with the FML. And I like how he commented on a comment, which, once again, had nothing to do with the comment.
ascott1127 0
actually I think it was along the lines of op is an idiot and therefore should be the "poster child" for birth control..... because if you take birth control this could have been prevented!
ImaWiseGuy 5
181 it all implied to the fml, it's ok if my complexities confuse you....
ImaWiseGuy 5
applied*
Malkria 1
what does ydi mean? -_-
wrigleys 4
It means 'You did it yourself'. Anyway, its like eating a cookie the day after it expires, its still going to taste like a cookie.
theshortness7299_fml 2
It means "You deserve it"...
threer 30
Your dick's intact. It means 'stop complaining, your dick didn't fall off'.
Matias_Says_FML 4
One word: idiot.
SirObvious 1
that was three.
flockz 20
thank you captain obv... oh sorry sir obvious lol
venom2421 10
lol his name fits
whybother8 0
sir obvious.. your screen name is amazing!
kkbabe01xo 0
D-U-M-B-A-S-S! What does that spell? Op!!
YacL 15
You're lying, there aren't enough letters in there to spell OP!
kkbabe01xo 0
Oh you're right! I have never been the greatest speller...
matt5217 4
dum bass?
yummycupkake 0
hahahaha no it doesn't
talensledge1 0
Dumbass,Spelled with the words Dumb and Ass,Usually refering to people like Op.
daisyjess 9
what does op stand for??
rocketeer_97 1
103- Orange Penis.
asoptavlo14 6
103- or origami peninsula, only use the latter option in extreme circumstances.
agaba 0
OP = organized poop
IndigoFuckYou 9
Octopus Placenta.
everybodyluvsMEN 0
You guys are all stupid.... OP= Octavius's Plight. For when he ran from Rome after he killed Caesar, DUH
illmatic2 16
Obnoxious Pizza.
tona01 16
oblivious pepperso
Darklord53 0
Original Planter.
threer 30
Guys. Stop lying to the newbies. It means Obvious Prick. OP's meaning is for the posters that deserve what happened.
aphelps 0
u are the perfect example an idiot. what a dumbass YDI
knights95 9
Just wait till her tazer expires
iSlappedCupid 0
Your smart :/
Destabilized 0
You're pretty smart yourself. Dumbass.
xJudii 5
You're* -.-
xXSillyLoveXx 0
I'm pretty sure that's what 42 was hinting at...
xXshadowrollerXx 6
I can't even feel sympathy for you on this one, OP.
wunderhosen 6
Really? It's pepper spray. You should have enough common sense not to do that -.-
McAninch35 9
Your hair looks like it wants to eat my face
wunderhosen 6
Haha xD
lmaoatall 6
you must be related to the other op who used mouth wash for her stuffy nose. it's a family affair today in fml land.