Today, my family attended the funeral of an old family friend's baby, who died in childbirth. Afterwards, my husband went around snickering and quietly telling dead baby jokes to the other attendees. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Today, I attended the funeral of a close friend. Most of the other guests were openly grinning and joking around, and the guy in front of me kept muttering, "That's what she said!" during the eulogy. FML
Today, my sister announced her pregnancy at my husband's funeral. FML
Today, during my uncle's funeral, my four year old loudly asked, "Where's all the dead people?" FML
Today, my son and I attended the funeral of a family friend. It went as well as any funeral could, up until the point that my apparently drunk son tried to grope the widow. I came an inch away from causing my son to need his own funeral. FML
Today, at the funeral home where I work, I asked my boss if it was time to "bring out the stiff". I didn't realize the guy's family was not only in the building, but within earshot as well. FML
Today, I was at work, when a co-worker began to shake a near empty box. Without thinking, I shouted "What if there was a baby in there? You just killed it!" I then remembered she recently suffered a miscarriage. FML
Today, I got a horrible case of the hiccups while at my friend's mother's funeral, resulting in me squeaking loudly every five seconds during the eulogy. My friend glared daggers at me until I left the room, then later accused me of being an insensitive bitch for "trying to ruin the funeral." FML
Today, I attended my mother's funeral. My husband came too, and during the service, I kept hearing him giggling. I wrote it off as the usual awkward nerves, until he started snorting too, and I caught sight of the iPhone under his jacket. He was reading this very site. FML
Today, a pregnant friend who is due in 2 weeks posted a picture of a baby on Facebook. I commented congratulations. She's still pregnant. It was a picture of her baby who died 3 years ago. FML
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Top comments
choose8 0
that's messed up
ADayToPierceTheV 0
what a dick
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Comments (162)
choose8 0
that's messed up
Queene2599 6
very messed up lol
wordnerd42 0
Would turning this thread into a series of dead baby jokes be poor taste then? ...nah, this is the Internet. What's funnier than a dead baby? :D
GuitarFail123 9
not funny^
Trupe 3
Who came up with dead baby jokes? what made people think a dead baby was funny?
PhilipTheDeacan 0
idk what is funnier than a dead baby?
missyummyishot 3
that's exactly what I was thinking ? like , I have never heard a dead baby joke before ..
wordnerd42 0
A dead baby in a clown suit :D And yes, I am prepared to be flamed by the forum. But a few of you are still here for humor, regardless of the topic.
ifailplzinsultme 0
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw... Preparing to get thumbed down by over sensitive people.
BeastMode5 0
6, I'm now curious of the answer, do tell. I've only heard the one about a Ferrari and a dumpster full of dead babies. Sorry not appropriate... OP, your dad is horrible!
Jacobt24 19
I know my next comment will probably be thumbs downed but here it goes
BeastMode5 0
Should've commented sooner. But either way, that dead baby jerk didn't make me laugh. =/
FarSide 23
@51: Just WTF do you know about humor, kid? Perhaps you would like to tell rape jokes about your mother?
Jacobt24 19
how do you get 100 babies in a bathtub? a blender how do you get them out? tortilla chips
BeastMode5 0
And I meant husband not dad... Okay, so I'm going to go to sleep before mess up another comment...
wordnerd42 0
Other possible answers were: Two dead babies stapled together! :D A dead baby being eaten by a live one! A dead baby with a false mustache! It goes on and on.. Yippee, now I'm gonna be the guy with all of his comments buried! :D
eckksDeeitsTravi 0
whats the difference between a dead baby and a sandwich? i dont **** a sandwich before i eat it. Whats similar about them? women makes them.
blanquito 1
what's the difference between a trampoline and a pregnant girlfriend?.... you take your shoes off before you jump on the trampoline
SteelCladAngel 0
dead baby 'jokes' are just wrong, as are molestation/rape 'jokes' joke about race, religion, sexuality, age etc but to tell jokes about dead babies at the funeral for an infant who died as it was supposed to have its first breaths?! ugh. medieval torture drawing and quartering by miniature horses, tarring and feathering, thumbscrews, the rack...anything!!
SteelCladAngel 0
my comment was meant to be in reply to #22
ifailplzinsultme 0
What's the hardest thing about pushing a baby downstairs? My dick. Ok, I agree that one was kinda bad...
choose8 0
I honestly wouldn't be that offended by that kind of joke, it's just the circumstances.. it's really disrespectful to the family and q funerals no place for joking especially about the deceased person...
ifailplzinsultme 0
where'd all the dead baby jokes go?
wordnerd42 0
72 - I know that on the Internet, humor is impersonal. Don't take it personally. I know that if I heard a rape joke about someone's mother, I'd probably laugh, assuming it was comedically potent. My own mother has been an emotional wreck since my dad died, FYI. In OP's case, yes it was wrong. However, most of the forum shoots right past empathy for OP after hitting the FYL button, and hits up the comments section for good laughs.
MrFlintstone 5
thats extremely inconsiderate
xxwafflez 0
lets hear em, what did he say?
CCrunner2 0
all I can say is... WTF
wordnerd42 0
118 - We're not allowed to, "the man" is watching. Anyone who had comments removed knows.
MsSoulReaper 27
What a mature husband OP has.
choose8 0
That's messed up...
steph87_fml 0
that's so bad if it were my house and my family I'd throw his ass out!!!
iSurf_fml 8
What if op's husband had a traumatizing experience with a baby brother or sister when he was little. I know it sounds unlikely, but some people cope like that for the rest of their lives. I like to give everybody the benefit of the doubt sometimes.
AngryCanadian 0
What's grosser than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? One dead baby nailed to ten trees.
AngryCanadian 0
what's the difference between a Ferrari and a bag full of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.
ZiplockP 0
lolol...****** up but I was waiting for a dead baby joke
ADayToPierceTheV 0
what a dick
TheBlackCops 0
That's what she said, to me.
muselover23 0
that's just the sickest thing I've ever heard. it's a reason for a divorce right there!
somethinorother 0
nonsense
A7X_LoVeee 10
I agree. What the hell is wrong with your husband? If he is going to be so immature about something like this, I can only imagine how he handles other situations. Perhaps your hubby & Casey Anthony would get along well. Absolutely disgusting.
wordnerd42 0
Wow, while I posted that, the mods struck. Shucks..
lmfao1643 3
Hey you just have a reason to tell some "your mom jokes" at his moms funeral.
akmufasa 1
really? how much more immature can your husband get? smh
jkrupili12 0
that is kinda shitty....do you remember the jokes?
flockz 20
hahahahha when i read this FML i did not think of what were the jokes he told first? but i guess some people are different. but ya now i wanna know what he was joking about lol
leematoad 0
wow your really concerned about tge jokes?
Cokie_the_Clown 5
That's terrible, hopefully someone kicked him in the balls, and then said "well I just killed your children" or something like that.
lol_ironic_life 9
Either he mourns by making jokes to cheer himself up and others around him. Maybe he's socially awkward? Or he needs to see a shrink. Yet, that's just assuming. Best advice... Perhaps talk about it with him?
green_eggs_and_h 0
Your husband needs help. I'm dead serious.
instnt1nfction 17
dead baby serious
k8izgr8_fml 0
95- I might be a terrible person but that literally made me lol:x
xxlauruh 0
hahaha