Today, my mum cleaned my room. When I got home she yelled at me for having condoms. I'm 24 years old and in a long term relationship. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom cleaned up my room. I had a drawer filled with condoms, 2 vibrators, and a bondage kit. She organized the condoms and vibrators in a shoe box. FML
Today, I’m 20 and my mom is well aware I’m having sex. Nonetheless, this morning when my boyfriend was going down on me under the covers, she marched into my room without knocking, dumped a load of wet laundry on my sofa, and walked back out. FML
Today, my mom barged into my room, threw 5 boxes of condoms at me, then said, "So you don't get pregnant". She still hasn't accepted the fact that I'm a lesbian. FML
Today, my mom came into my room to yell at me because she thought she heard me having sex, saying I'm too young for it. I'm 23 and I wasn't having sex. The noises were from my dad watching porn in the next room. FML
Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said, "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML
Today, my mother was sneaking through my underwear and found my condoms and the bills from the hospital where I had my IUD inserted. She then started yelling at me, saying that I didn't have permission to not have children and that, "I get to choose, not you." I'm 28 years-old. FML
Today, I told my mother that I'm pregnant. She went off screaming at me about how I shouldn't be having sex. I am 25 and have been happily married for 3 years. FML
Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML
Today, my mom cleaned my room, while doing so she found a very detailed sex book I got from an ex boyfriend as a "gift". For years I had her convinced I was still a virgin, until today. FML
Today, my mum was watching a program about sexually transmitted diseases. Later on, she started telling me that I should be careful and use the right protection when having sex. Suddenly she stopped and said, "Actually, I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you don’t have a boyfriend!" FML
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Top comments
MatheusRajuidas 5
She probably will always see you as her little innocent daughter...
erikabt820 2
Clean your own room, your mum won't have to do it for you!
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Comments (340)
MissHayleyJames 7
Like Doc said, shit happens, jobs are hard to find and even if you find one, the cost of living is so damn high you often can't live on your own. How many of you have tried to live on $1000 a month or so and not live with your parents or someone else? If I wasn't married, my $1000 a month would mean I'd have to move back in with my parents. This is the new reality. Cost of living is high, wages are low. You don't have many choices. And I'm thinking OP does clean her room but some moms still go in and do more. That's how my mother in law is for my 22 year old brother in law, and how she was before I married my husband.
mikeawesome 0
I'm thinking u need to be a man a move out
DocBastard 40
This might be difficult considering OP has a ****** and all.
RedPillSucks 33
I heard gender reassignment is usually the fastest way to get kicked out of the house.
KleeTEE_fml 0
shouldn't you..uhm.. maybe have your own place?
Kaerunoutof 3
Of course your mom yelled "FLIRT!!!", doesn't she?
skyeyez9 25
Move out. It isn't impossible to find a place and live there. Get roommates to help with the rent. It is better than living with your parents. I moved out three months after I turned 18 and don't regret it a bit. I preferred freedom over having to deal with their house rules and eternally treating me like I am 12.
skyeyez9 25
You may not find a house or apartment that was ideal initially, but people rarely move straight from home to a 3000sq ft home with a 3 car garage. Gotta work your way up.
DataWog 30
You can also go for a more non-traditional living arrangement. In my area, at the cheapest rate for single-person accommodation, over the period of a 4-year college course, you'd be spending in the area of $35,000 just to live in someone else's house. Most of which would probably end up on the student loans. So, alternative option, buy an RV and live in that for a few years. Even the relatively recent models can be had secondhand for a decent price. And even if it's all put on student loans, it would still be equal to less than a year of rent payments. If you don't mind a bit of a fix-er-upper, I once even saw a shell go for $150. No, I'm not missing a zero there. A few hundred/couple thousand in interior work and you have a home for dirt cheap. Need to move? Gas 'er up and go. No need to employ a pack of friends with a truck to help you move boxes, just find a new place to park and be on your way. If you don't mind moving around a lot you can 'stealth camp', but it's more for travelers, as hanging out in the same area will cause your vehicle to start being recognized. For more long-term, just post on Craigslist if anyone's got an unused 10'x20' piece of land they'd be interested in earning an extra $100 a month for. I've seen a few posts like that go up in my area, and they've always disappeared after a week or so. Trick it out with a solar panel and you don't need to pay hydro, give it a composting toilet so you don't have to dump your sewage. Live in the bush if you want to. Bonus? No roommates, no upstairs neighbours, and after a few years of pocketing all that money you would otherwise have spent on rent, you can put a nice down payment on that nice house of your dreams. Or even build it. Or, maybe you like living free and just decide to trick out your RV some more.
MissHayleyJames 7
I would much rather still be living with overbearing parents than roommates. I will NEVER have roommates again. It's nothing but one big nightmare. Having roommates is the best way to bring out your nasty side.
MangaManiacNat 13
Maybe she wants grandchildren =P
fishereric 1
Why are you 24 and living with your mom?
israelnotjacob 20
Because in the real world a lot of people need to do that. Just because you were an idiot and pissed away all kinds of money moving out as early as is humanly possible whether it was actually a smart financial move or not doesn't mean everyone else should in this day and age.
aleishaa_jadee 13
# 101. So original. That exact same comment has only been posted liked 20 times.. Good job on writing a comment no one else has written on this FML. :/
grannygruber 6
Maybe given your relationship she wants a grandchild!
tbenson0628 14
yet u still live at home....