Today, my mom asked me if I had any plans to go out tonight. To divert attention, I pretended to be angry and accused her of prying into my social life. Actually, I have no social life and nobody to go out with. My only "big plans" were to finish my Sudoku book. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend about having plans on tonight so he'd think I had a life outside of him. All my "friends" are going to a party. I'm not invited. FML
Today, I talked to my mom about hanging out with her. She got out her phone to schedule an appointment. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going out to hang out with some friends. She looked me dead in the eye and said, "Don't lie to me." FML
Today, I had to pretend my phone was broken because my mom kept calling to ask if she could join my friends and me for karaoke night. FML
Today, I went out to dinner with my mom and several of her friends. My mom spent the entire night gushing about my Ivy League school and med student boyfriend. I attend a state university and I'm single. She threatened to cut me off if I didn't play along. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML
Today, I didn't want to hang out with my girlfriend so I could binge watch Pawn Stars instead. When she asked me why not, I lied not very convincingly and said my mom was sick and needed my help. She now thinks I'm cheating on her. FML
Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML
Today, my mother is so overdramatic that her response to finding out I lost a friend's book was that I should fake my own death rather than fess up. FML
Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML
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Top comments
pbonham 22
Your mum was being nice to you!!! How could you be mean like that for no reason?!?!
LGuard 13
Just wow, sounds psychotic to me.
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Comments (78)
Enslaved 38
I love su doku puzzles! I always purchase 3 at a time from the dollar store.(: But planning to finish them has never been a highlight of my night. ***I have gone out to coffee shops or had dinner solo sitting at a bar with only my books to keep me company. I always started up conversations with people asking me about the puzzles. It might be a great conversation starter to meet others that share the same interest as the OP.(:
perdix 31
I try something similar, except instead of the sudoku book, I bring a whistling butt-plug. I've yet to start a conversation with a stranger. I probably ought to try something else. . .
Enslaved 38
I think I'd prefer not to know what's the cause of it to . . . whistle. :P
perdix 31
Evidently, the people sitting next me at the bars and coffee shops share your lack of curiosity. All that work I put into learning "Bridge over the River Kwai" and not a single query!
Enslaved 38
I'm more of a "Flight of the Bumblebee" type of girl.(:
misvenus000 4
A simple "im sorry mom but I am busy" would be a bit more appropriate considering your mom was only questioning if you had plans. Ydi for being rude to her.
gracehi 33
Then her mom would have likely asked, "Oh really? So what are you doing?" She should just be honest with her mom. It's not like her own mother would think any less of her.
2RaRa25 6
This might be why you have no social life. Perhaps you should start being nicer to people, starting with your mother.
LittleGreenPaola 23
Maybe your mother was hoping you were going out. I'm sure she knows about your lack of social life, even if you don't talk to her about it, so you don't need to pretend anything!
Kiki242 19
You bitched at your mom for nothing? My mom would have slapped me.
BabySparkle1 15
No need to get shitty at your mom, just because you have no life.
SadIife 6
And this is when you should put your sudoku book down and go outside to actually meet people.
skyeyez9 25
I was happy to be an introvert as a teen and not go to parties and crap like that. Staying home where it was quiet and peaceful is alot better.
ruabadfishtoo 0
until you start having conversations with your self and start talking to your cats...not that I do that or anything
skyeyez9 25
I am allergic to cats, but I have two dogs. I should clarify I was not a hermit, I did have friends. But I did not like going to parties and where there are alot of people, it always made me feel anxious from all the noise and feeling crowded in. I preferred to hang out with 3-5 close friends.
Angelastic_fml 18
Introverts unite! But not too often, and let's make it somewhere quiet where we can talk.
realeah 4
Nerd life. Forever.
linkinpark98 24
Nerds Unite!
medichick 5
A simple "no" probably would have sufficed. Go make some friends and stop yelling at your mom.