Today, my mom asked me if I had any plans to go out tonight. To divert attention, I pretended to be angry and accused her of prying into my social life. Actually, I have no social life and nobody to go out with. My only "big plans" were to finish my Sudoku book. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to lie to my boyfriend about having plans on tonight so he'd think I had a life outside of him. All my "friends" are going to a party. I'm not invited. FML
Today, I talked to my mom about hanging out with her. She got out her phone to schedule an appointment. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going out to hang out with some friends. She looked me dead in the eye and said, "Don't lie to me." FML
Today, I had to pretend my phone was broken because my mom kept calling to ask if she could join my friends and me for karaoke night. FML
Today, I went out to dinner with my mom and several of her friends. My mom spent the entire night gushing about my Ivy League school and med student boyfriend. I attend a state university and I'm single. She threatened to cut me off if I didn't play along. FML
Today, I told my mom I was going on a date tonight. She laughed and didn't believe me. When I tried to convince her it was real, she got mad and grounded me for lying. I had to cancel the date. FML
Today, I didn't want to hang out with my girlfriend so I could binge watch Pawn Stars instead. When she asked me why not, I lied not very convincingly and said my mom was sick and needed my help. She now thinks I'm cheating on her. FML
Today, my parents accused me of being secretive. I have no idea what they're talking about; all I do is work, go to school, sleep, and eat. Now I'm grounded until I tell them what's going on. I have crazy parents, that's what's going on. FML
Today, my mother is so overdramatic that her response to finding out I lost a friend's book was that I should fake my own death rather than fess up. FML
Today, I told my parents that I was going to hang out with some friends. My dad guffawed and said, "Ooh, look at Mary, pretending she has a social life." Thanks, Dad. FML
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Top comments
pbonham 22
Your mum was being nice to you!!! How could you be mean like that for no reason?!?!
LGuard 13
Just wow, sounds psychotic to me.
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Comments (78)
OlivierSillegue_fml 9
I half way think that your life sucks and that you deserve it, partly because you could remedy to this situation by going out and trying to make some friends. On the other hand, solving Sudoku puzzles is a very nice way to spend an evening.
ohcrapitscurtis 8
Don't be a jerk to your mom because you have no plans.
Leslier_fml 4
Gosh, now you are pathetic with anger issues! You should work on that.
worldclassrager 41
hey better than nothing...right?
skullofdarkness 18
I'll be your friend OP! :) just don't yell at me.
zuzupetalsYO 11
Maybe she wanted to actually hang out with you. Man, I do love Sudoku.
coolbrony12 3
Woah next new Twilight Sparkle! Go make some friends!
cnn123 1
Your life sucks..no need to take it our on your mom!
Britt125 16
Could have just said no, I don't feel like doing much. No need to be a jerk. YDI. Plus she probably figured out why you were being so defensive and upset, because people don't tend to do that for no reason, so you're really not covering anything up. Oh, and you might want to think about why you don't have friends. Yelling at people for asking a basic question, might be a reason.
Angelastic_fml 18
Why are so many people on here so ashamed of having not much of a social life that they lie about it? If you like staying home and doing sudoku, or going to movies by yourself (I think that's one of the things someone else mentioned), just do it. You don't have to always be out partying with lots of 'friends' around just so other people won't think you're a loser. Not everybody needs or prefers a lot of people around to enjoy themselves. And of all people, your mum is probably least likely to make fun of you for not going out. She'd be glad you're not likely to get up to anything stupid. If, on the other hand, you really don't like sitting at home doing sudoku, and would rather be going out, then yes, fyl, but there's no need to lie about it.