Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my cat died in the process of eating, and choking on, my hamster. FML
Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML
Today, I thought my hamster might be lonely, so I went to the pet shop and bought a new one to keep him company. The new hamster killed the old one. FML
Today, I found my pet hamster that escaped yesterday, wet and soggy, next to my pet dog. My dog chewed it. FML
Today, I put my hamster in his ball, and spent about an hour cleaning his cage. When I came back, I realized he wasn't even alive. FML
Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML
Today, I found out my creepy, obsessive neighbor got a pet hamster and named it after me. He has been telling all sorts of stories about his hamster using my name, and he just told me in detail how it died of heart attack. FML
Today, I listened to my mom having a conversation with my dog, asking him if he ate my hamster. My hamster isn't even dead. FML
Today, I got back home and my hamster was dead. I left notes two weeks ago everywhere to remind my parents to feed it while I was overseas. Apparently, my parents even didn't realize I was gone. FML
Today, I was looking after a hamster for a friend. My dog ate it. FML
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Top comments
yourmurderscenex 13
im sorry but this should teach you a lesson.. you dont give a hamster a BOWL to drink water out of. you give them water bottles that hooks on the side of their cage. ugh. idiot.
Cheeto21 0
Thats why people have water BOTTLES for their hamsters...
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Comments (183)
Daileyyy 0
I love fat chicks.
littlexlion 4
It's all about you, isn't it? Poor hamster.
gutierrez_11 2
I can't spell for shit. Please bury my comment.
ohthebloodygore 16
34, you're an idiot.
Alexandriamuahh 0
haha suckz 4 ur ass
ImaginaryFoe 1
YDI for being a sad sack that makes everything about you. I almost wish I'd drowned myself instead of reading your post. Seriously, you are taking the death of an obviously stupid animal way too personally. If you think you are horrible, change and then stop projecting your own lack of self-worth into a rodent.
ele5ment 0
agreed
thelastavailable 13
Maybe you should do pushups or something to let off some steam..
RedPillSucks 33
Bwhahaha. Imaginary Foe reminds me of the scene in "Airplane" when the Japanese guy commits HariKari when the lead character starts talking about life.
ImaginaryFoe 1
Just saw that the other day! Later on the old lady hangs herself when he drones on again!
Madame_Javert 4
56: hara-kiri. :)
UpsidedownKayak 9
You should have taught you hamster to swim. Don't make that mistake on the next one, or get it a water bottle. glub, glub, glub...
AMAZINashleigh 6
That's what you get for not teaching him how to swim. Tsk tsk tsk.
skyeyez9 25
Exactly how deep was your water bowl for the poor thing?
skyeyez9 25
Hamsters don't live very ling anyways. They are more prone to nipping at fingers more than other pet rodents. Rats make great pets. They are affectionate, intelligent, learn to come when you call their name and can learn simple tricks.
chili10 18
I agree, rats are the sweetest. I've been begging my mom for one for years, no luck though.
_HeadShot_ 0
yea ure right. they don't live very "ling"
xFalzz 0
You're*
t765234 10
Way to fail 105, I congratulate you.
perdix 31
I feel his pain. You're trapped in a cage and a giant that outweighs you a thousand to one hovers over you whining about her shit life while inundating you with the noxious gases of her foul breath. If he had access to a mini-shotgun, I'm sure he'd have blown out his brains with it. After reading your self-indulgent, whiny, pitiful story, I find my will to live ebbing away.
92910bg 4
Very nice well written " will to life ebbing away " lol
KrisLorraine 0
Now op, i told you that swimming pools are NOT water bowls.. Geez.