Today, my girlfriend asked me if I loved her. I tried to be cute and romantic and responded with a quote from the Notebook, which I watched with her yesterday. After I said, "If you're a bird, I'm a bird," she broke up with me because I was "phony and unoriginal." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me because I wouldn't make my senior quote, "I love my girlfriend more than anything." FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she loved me for the first time. Unfortunately, it was her way of saying that she didn't want to lose me after cheating on me yesterday. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me. Two weeks ago she complained that I didn't act like I really loved her. I then became more involved and caring just for her to show my love. The reason she broke up with me? Because I was "suffocating her with clinginess." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a complete breakdown. I was trying to calm her down and reassure her that she will accomplish all of her dreams. Her response: "Then why am I even with you?" FML
Know your worth
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML
Today, after a week of intense fighting, my girlfriend of 4 years and I hung out. She told me she loved me, and I pointed out that last week she said she was going to dump me. Without missing a beat, she replied, "Only to scare you into submission." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out that she wasn't really in love with me. She got that advice from an internet survey. FML
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she was scared that she was more in love with me than I was in her, and that she was afraid I would leave her. So she left me instead. I'd been thinking about proposing. FML
Top comments
Mideoyeo 12
Well, now you know that you obviously deserve better than this ungrateful bitch. Sorry OP, hope you find someone nicer! (:
AsianCookie247 14
Your girlfriend is unappreciative. I personally think that's really sweet and cute. Sorry, OP.
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Comments (201)
Mideoyeo 12
Well, now you know that you obviously deserve better than this ungrateful bitch. Sorry OP, hope you find someone nicer! (:
emag_eht 18
I agree. She should be touched that you share the same feelings. Would she say you're copying her lines if you simply said "I love you" back? You deserve better because apparently she needs William Shakespeare himself to say he loves her in a romantic way.
jmk1469 5
Don't be sad. She probably wasn't worth your time anyways.
sirpantselot 22
True that. Just because you can photograph something that already exists doesn't mean photography isn't art. Finding the right passage of a poem (or film) can be as romantic as writing it yourself.
missamerica95 0
Most girls would be ecstatic that their guy even watched the Notebook with them in the first place, let alone quoted from it.
Inheritance 10
My opinion that's the sweetest thing a guy could say. But to have her say and do that she isn't worth your time. Sorry OP.
Mommyof2_91 10
14- I don't think they share the same feelings. If she really loved him it wouldn't her been so easy to dump him over something so ridiculous.
Mommyof2_91 10
Have* I'm not quite sure where "her" came from.
pokemonchick14 12
She was clearly just looking for a reason to break up with him, and that was the best thing she could find. sorry OP, that sucks.
XanderScythe 11
Yeah, I mean, that's like saying, " I love you." , and then she says, "thats what everyone says! You are phony and unoriginal." WTH?
Sencilia 14
Sorry to hear that, OP. You can do way better.
shayshayshazam 14
Agreed. I dislike when girls act like that. They don't realize how good they have it.
thesubconscious 9
Defiantly not who you should be looking for
bioboy725 10
I'm pretty sure you meant definitely.
thesubconscious 9
I guess people hate bad spelling. I think the spell check did that
alliewillie 22
Spell check wouldn't have caught that as "defiantly" is a word. Just the wrong one.
XanderScythe 11
I like how that "defiantly" quote became a new topic. : /
skatrgirl96 4
I know this has nothing to do with this but can someone please tell me what OP means?.....
palahniukpaul 6
I don't blame her
Tits_N_Turbos 20
Luckily a good looking guy like you can be fussy........
ImaginaryFoe 1
This is the shit that pisses me off. Some people around here are so snarky and judgmental when it comes to other posters' profile pics. Let that same poster put in an FML about getting dumped or insulted and it's all "you deserve better", "you're beautiful", "you'll find someone else". You don't know if OP is a raging douchebag that you would call creepy if you met face to face. All you know is one incident in his life from his own point of view but you're so sure he'll get a better gf.
emba_fml 13
neither do i, honestly. how freaking cheesy.
Ninjasaurus18 9
71- He was trying to be a good boyfriend, but apparently his ex is too good for him.
Feared 9
45- I can't see your pic, but I would imagine that you're ugly as shit.
wallandpiece 16
78 - And I'm sure that's you in your picture.
Katiekhalifa_fml 28
Did anyone else facepalm at 78's bio or am I alone here?
OffToTheGayBar 9
88 - I did read it, but I didn't facepalm. No, my inner-monologue was just screaming "DOUCHEBAG!" He sounds so pretentious it's not even comedy-worthy.
RedPillSucks 33
That's still a stupid reason to dump someone. Sounds like she was just looking for any lame excuse. Sorry, replied to the wrong thing. This shouldn't be here
emba_fml 13
i agree that it was a sweet gesture on op's part and that his girlfriend went a little overboard in dumping him, but still...cheesy as hell! :p
bobeattaco 5
Cool story bro
marmlr339 14
88 - yea I read it too and thought exactly the same! "I'm not cocky." ... 4 lines later... "I'm an expert in diet, fitness, mathematics..." ... An expert? Really?
bobeattaco 5
And I can imagine that you're a ******* idiot.
skoob1 12
88, yeah I did... As soon as she said "from Canada"
Rowdey 10
Okay, Bobeattaco is calling someone a "******* idiot". Awesome. Look at your bio.
bobeattaco 5
Look at how you spell you're it's a troll mate. And " you're" on a computer go look up how to spell ^.^
cablooey 0
129 - Ummm if you knew the correct uses of the words "your" and "you're" you would know that 121 used "your" perfectly. Unless people are in the habit of saying "you are bio"?
Rowdey 10
*And "you're" on a computer; go look up how to spell. You missed a semicolon. Also.. you're stupid.
AsianCookie247 14
Your girlfriend is unappreciative. I personally think that's really sweet and cute. Sorry, OP.
uJelly24 1
Wtf is notebook?
Hiimhaileypotter 53
The Notebook is a movie based off of a book by Nicholas Sparks.
plaguer 26
Everyone is different. On one hand I agree that quote is being run into the ground and getting annoying, but I couldn't imagine breaking up with someone over it.
evamusical 12
Its a beautiful movie... I think its way better then titanic i cried so loud!
patrickalamo 48
Next...girlfriend in line please Very small minded on her part Very thoughtful on yours..
SparkleyTurtle 4
Not phony and unoriginal, just super lame...
louiseth 9
This guy is a bird, the last guy was a shark. Is there something your all not telling me?
FMLsAreAwesome 0
26- It's kinda obvious because there's only one "your" in the sentence...
bunny911 16
68- you don't say?
Blacksabbath211 9
The animorphs are back xD
louiseth 9
92 Animorphs used to terrify me as a kid. I used to cover my ears with a blanket when I slept because I thought people would try to put those slug things in them.
random_jay 6
I loved animorphs so much I tried to catch a bug and transform one time xD
Doortje 30
If you're a p(h)on(e)y, I'm a p(h)on(e)y.
AsianCookie247 14
Do us all a favor and Lay off the bathsalts, before you start to crave human flesh.
Doortje 30
Bath salt is so 2011, bath pearls all the way :)
lorenzoman77 7
Doortje- dude, just stop talking.. *facepalm*
PeteyPablo12308 20
Lorenzoman- dude, put a shirt on.
PYLrulz 17
Doortje, you know it's better to be thought of as an idiot, rather than opening your mouth (or in this case, using your keyboard), and removing all doubt
ALpein 0
I'm a brony and that made me sad.
Ugi 27
It's pretty petty of her to break up for that reason, but I suspect she really did so because she thought you were avoiding the questions.
DjeePee 25
You actually watched The Notebook? And she didn't even appreciate your sacrifice? Poor boy.
Drigr 9
Watching The Notebook is a sacrifice? I must be doing it wrong..
TheDrudgeChild 4
90, to put it kindly it's not everyone's type of movie. (This coming from a female who hates chick flicks with a passion)
DjeePee 25
If you do not feel the urge to run away/throw heavy things at the tv/fall asleep/... while watching The Notebook, there must be something terrible wrong with you. There are a few movies that I hate with all my heart and The Notebook is one of them. Oh my, what a terrible scenario it was. If those two lovebirds would just act rational, decide that they are independent from their parents and would get a relationship/marriage from the beginning, I wouldn't have to watch two hours of 'I love you, but this can't be! *goes away* *comes back* I love you, but this can't be! *and so on*' shit.
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
I personally just enjoyed how cute the elderly couple was. And when they died together? I died.
rainbowglass 5
Are you also a bird, since OP and his ex were birds?
jarlaxle1138 3
It's a terrible excuse for a love story.
george_daniel_bu 0
OP grow a pair
darwinism 30
Even if he does, they would not be noticeable. Bird testicles are internal.