Today, my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. She's pregnant. I'm a virgin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. She also said I'm going to be an uncle. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
Today, I found out via a Twitter post that my girlfriend is pregnant. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of four years. She took the opportunity to tell me that she's pregnant. With my half-brother. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend is four months pregnant. She can't wait for us to be parents. I guess she forgot that I haven't seen her in 7 months. FML
Today, my girlfriend started to plan our wedding. We've been going out for 3 days. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
Today, my husband of 3 years learned that he's going to be a father. No, I'm not pregnant. FML
Top comments
MrHughJass 0
You're doing it wrong.
doctor_awesome 8
is her name Mary?
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Comments (231)
mosquito19 14
well then she's not your girlfriend. you wasted 3 years thinking she's your grilfriend. that makes you a stalker.
chujel1302 1
run away!
Ugi 27
You said you are a virgin but there's plenty of things you might have been doing that fall short of full sex and some of them can still get her pregnant. Anything involving touching her after you have semen/sperm around could do it - so if she gives you a hand-job and then touches herself or you touch her after you have touched yourself (that sticky liquid you express quite early on is full of sperm) then she could get pregnant. Of course you may both have kept your knickers tightly on for 3 years, in which case it's clearly someone else who's been doing the deed, but is that really likely?
Ins0mau 20
Why do you mean "is that really likely?" OF COURSE IT'S BLOODY LIKELY!! Men aren't the only ones that cheat.
Ugi 27
I meant was it likely that they had been together for 3 years without getting into each other's pants even if they didn't have "sex". My fault for not being clear there.
babygirlc1 5
3 years and you're still a virgin? fyl
Sunny_Eclipse 6
Dude, that sucks! Just be glad you didn't buy the engagement ring yet! AND VIRGINS SHALL RULE THE WORLD!
a_nutritionist 10
great, pre pubescent children and conservative religious fanatics are gonna rule the world. cant wait for that...
ritsuka415 6
how awful of her :/ sorry hun!
Capt_Oblivious 10
Another case of someone believing abstinence is an effective means of birth control. When will they learn?
yeamate 0
ahahahahaha!!!!!
goshpeople 4
Well, apparently HE practiced abstinence. Is he the one involved in an unplanned pregnancy? No. The girlfriend and the guy she did the deed with who decided NOT to be abstinent are the ones with a pregnancy on their hands.
sleepingman11 0
three years of no sex. no wonder she cheated on u bro. sorry:/
taazer 12
if u never slept together and have been together for three years you cant blame the girl for looking for some action ( dont get me wrong, i think she's a bitch and that he should dumb her sorry ass)
sportsfreakpc12 0
agreed... but she shuld have at lest left him b4 she wanted to get some action if she wasn't already getting any
mikechek 3
well the only thing I can think of that doesn't involve her cheating is if in those 3 years of dating you slept in the same room with her is that she took advantage of u while u were asleep and now she is pregnant with ur child I think that's called rape good luck in life op