Today, my boyfriend had a Christmas party for all of our friends. He asked me not to get "too drunk". I think throwing up on the floor while simultaneously peeing your pants fit his definition. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a little too drunk at my best friend's birthday party and threw up in the pub bathroom. I wiped everything up, composed myself, and went back to the party table before promptly throwing up on myself in front of the whole pub. FML
Today, after my work's Christmas party, everyone got so drunk that I had to help one of my only sober co-workers take everyone home and clean up vomit. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend for a romantic night at home. I put on my hottest little dress, dimmed the lights, and put music on. My boyfriend stumbled in much later, drunk, and took one look at me before throwing up on my feet. FML
Today, I had to clean my boyfriend's puke off of our bed. Last night he ditched me to go out partying, came home, threw up, and passed out. He thinks it's only fair I clean up today because he's "not feeling well". FML
Today, I got a drunken call from my boyfriend, which consisted of him telling me that he, "does man things like fuck bitches and roll with hoes," and that I've been, "trying to turn him into a half-ass girly man," but, "that shit ain't right." Then he threw up. FML
Today, during my beloved's birthday party, I had so much to drink that I puked all over the room. FML
Today, my boyfriend borrowed my Jane Norman dress to wear to a Halloween party. He got hammered, threw up all over it, and fell unconscious on the shower floor. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend's birthday. After spending a reasonable amount of cash to get us a nice hotel room to celebrate, he decides he would rather spend the night drinking with his friends. They all threw up in the bath tub before passing out on our bed. FML
Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML
Today, my boyfriend got so drunk that he was sick in the taxi, sick on me, then sick on himself when he was sitting on the toilet. What's more, I can't get into bed because he's been sick all over my half of the bed. So I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight. FML
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Top comments
fluropanda 0
YDI. I think this more of a FHL, for having to be your boyfriend, and suffering through humilation while his girlfriend puked everywhere and pissed herself.
24788 7
Don't drink if you can't handle it around other people. It's a pretty easy solution.
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Comments (56)
grimmelok 0
This is sad for your boyfriend. Obviously this is a big problem for you because your boyfriend had to ASK you not to get drunk off your ass. I hope he dumps you. He can obviously do better than have a girlfriend who's a drunk.
hedgehogs 0
I see this as a wake-up call for you. A classic definition of alcoholism is your drinking causing a problem for you or someone else. I think he's telling you that you have a drinking problem, and it sounds as if he's right.
BadOwner 0
...to drunk eh? u wanna be my new gf?
BadOwner 0
[insert joke about women's rights here]
catscratch_fml 1
Ya know what? Getting drunk is one thing. Getting drunk enough to throw up is another. Getting drunk enough to throw up without making it to a bathroom is pretty damned gross. And getting so drunk you pee your pants in front of people- or at all, for that matter? ...*Why*? Just, why? I have trouble imagining that anyone could get so drunk and *want* to continue being in the presence of other people, let alone do so repeatedly at parties. How are you not embarrassed to be so disgusting?
ChibiChibi_fml 28
I was trying to figure out if this FML was the OP saying that their boyfriend asked them not to get too drunk and they did anyway or was it a poor way of saying that their boyfriend got trashed after asking them not to get too drunk. I have no idea. If it's the first one then YDI if it's the second then yeah that sucks.
Cecelea 0
oh now that sucks majorly
asiancreampuff 0
YDI. No wonder your boyfriend tells you not to get too drunk, you make a complete and utter fool of yourself, as well as a source of major embarrassment to him.
harmony88 0
I honestly can't tell if she was the one that got drunk or her boyfriend... the OP wrote the FML ambiguously.
fbp6277 0
Aww, don't feel bad. That happened to me once at a fair. x.x So embarrasing, but everyone will forget everntually(hopefully).