Today, my parents bought me an alarm clock that runs away from you while beeping obnoxiously when you hit snooze. I just had ankle surgery and am unable to walk. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to find that my parents had replaced my regular alarm clock with a walking one that requires you to get up and find it. The alarm was set to 5:00AM, which would have been fine if it wasn't the weekend. FML
Today, my mother surprised me with a new alarm clock. It's attached to a toy car which races around my room with obnoxious sirens going at full blast until I crawl out of bed and turn it off. She says this will be a regular thing. FML
Today, I'm on bed rest after a major surgery. I can walk to the bathroom but can barely raise my hands. At the hospital, my mom gave this dramatic speech of being there whenever I needed her. When I asked her to come make me breakfast, she didn’t show up til noon then complained I was in a bad mood. FML
Today, my mother-in-law sent me a pedometer for my birthday. I've been confined to a wheelchair for most of my life. FML
Today, my dorm's fire alarm went off. In the rush to escape, I slipped and fell off my bunk bed, breaking my ankle in two places. Crying, I told my roommates I needed help to walk. They shrugged and left after mentioning that I would slow them down. FML
Today, I woke up after being sick from the flu and tried to get out of bed. I forgot I was in a bunk bed and broke my ankle in the fall down. FML
Today, I’m being kept awake in the middle of the night trying to distract myself with trashy TV as my entire foot radiates with pain. The surgery was a week ago. FML
Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML
Today, I woke up in my hospital bed after having knee surgery, on the wrong knee. FML
Today, I was so happy to be leaving the hospital after breaking my arm the night before. Just as I walked out of the doors, a huge ambulance team was running in at the same time, and knocked me down full force. I now have a broken ankle. FML
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Top comments
medfly 2
don't use it.
Dont_Explain 3
Better yet, put it up on a high ledge. "Run ******, run."
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Comments (111)
medfly 2
don't use it.
Dont_Explain 3
Better yet, put it on a high ledge. "Run ******, run."
Kylias 6
#5 wins.
chicagogirl5673 0
its not a plug in it iot its batteried other wise it wouldnt be able to run around. lol i have one too
Reyo 2
Hide it in your parent's bedroom before moving for college. I suggest somewhere secure, like right behind the drywall that's next to their bed.
clcagwin 0
better better yet, just face it towards the wall
letitbe56 0
#1 said it. Assuming you're not crippled for life, you can just use your phone or something until your foot heals. Your life isn't really that ******.
monster_tamer 11
#5 = win
baby_val 0
yea furreal
mariahrawks 0
the FML is they found out it runs away by pressing snooze and now have an annoying alarm clock running around.
ilovefatcats 12
how would it run away?
Comoke1024 19
Or, hide it in your parents' room.
Voids 0
That's harsh as **** haha.
michiganfan53 0
damn voids ur ugly as **** haha
seven_to_twelve 3
So don't use it until you're better. Unless you don't live with your parents, in which case don't use it at all, and bring it out when they visit. That sounds really annoying.
Dont_Explain 3
Better yet, put it up on a high ledge. "Run ******, run."
pepsie_fml 0
u own
kaprookie 3
I love you don't_explain
Juliaa15 6
#5 copier. >_>
Towerhead1 0
#6 IS #5. Fail
qwillis98 20
Meant to thumb up 104
kittykat1501 31
but you'd have to hit snooze first and OP can't stand.
Ireplywith_memes 0
Moar sauce? Didn't think so.
trillian_fml 0
so don't hit snooze. crisis solved
htownlove 0
exactly what I was thinking
24788 7
Baseball bats... they weren't just invented for playing baseball.
UnluckyChicka 0
24788- lmao, they're also for smashing peoples noses. ask my cousin how he broke my nose :)
g3rusz 6
So... there's no way to turn it off, right? Like... not activating it, or removing the batteries...
spitfire35 3
or is it one which turns into a monster and starts shooting at you if it gets pissed off by being turned off
8trickster8 0
*presses snooze* "I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Dave."
SweetPotatoVines 0
I think you win #34
LilaBear 2
hahahaha. Funny. At least it'll do its job, hey? And surely you must be able to walk somehow, even if it's on crutches, or at least get around in a wheelchair... how would you get out of bed otherwise??
perdix 31
Simple. Regift it to your boyfriend when you want to break up with him. Reset it for about 2 hours before his normal wake-up time to hasten the process.
UnluckyChicka 0
or if it's a school day, two hours after