Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML
Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years-old. FML
Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
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Top comments
nmcoy 6
Pink eye from the brown eye?
davincidasecond 24
Did you tell him it's "pink eye", not "pink dick"?
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Comments (90)
FretMasterLive 4
So.. No ones considered that he was actually joking and it just went above this girls head? If that's the case it's a pretty dumb joke, but a joke nonetheless.
iwadasn 33
Given that OP says he "freaked out" about it before making the comment, it doesn't seem very likely that he was joking.
150493x 29
You just got yourself a Get out of anal free card.
Ins0mau 20
Darn! That's a DOUBLE FML for her! She misses out!!
Adorlee 11
Well his dick only has one eye.
Ins0mau 20
He meant stink-eye.
Ari1337 15
trying to give the one eyed snake pink eye? shame on you OP.
lazygirlWOW 9
Well OP are you?!
carebear111 9
At least you know he doesn't like anal?
merc0230 9
How do you "accidentally" fart? Don't you mean, you accidentally farted loud enough for your bf to hear you? or you accidentally farted strong enough for him to feel it? I don't think you accidentally farted.
Metthew 15
Maybe if she was almost fallen asleep? Then I suppose it's hard to keep it in. :b
Brak_Spaceman 19
that's silly
icepick23 12
Oh please--girls do not fart. Only guys do that.