Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML
Today, I woke up to a disappointed boyfriend. He told me he spent an hour last night farting on my pillow to see if I would wake up with pink-eye. He's 23 years-old. FML
Today, I was having hot sex with my boyfriend. Then, I felt a puff of air hit my face and a rancid smell. My dog had farted in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
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Top comments
nmcoy 6
Pink eye from the brown eye?
davincidasecond 24
Did you tell him it's "pink eye", not "pink dick"?
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Comments (90)
mcm_3 16
Ummmm.... intreguing
Wizardo 34
This just confirms my suspicions that FML comments are turning into Dolan comics...
AculyAmber 12
This was a pretty funny mistake for someone with a brain for a picture!
bluerhhajfk 17
It really should be up-voted
nmcoy 6
Pink eye from the brown eye?
Fuji76 15
Wonder how you tell? Can't be because it gets swollen and oozes gunk, huh?
davincidasecond 24
Did you tell him it's "pink eye", not "pink dick"?
patrickalamo 48
And the difference between pink and purple is your grip.
ThePK 5
I don't think you realize that it's also called the "One-Eyed Snake". Therefore, easily he can get pinkeye there...!
PterodactylMan 23
At least he was careful, pink-eye is dangerous!
OneGirlTwoCups 13
And painful on the fourth of July.
SirEbro 7
And now he just needs an anatomy lesson.
ohSNAPyall 27
And contagious. Really, he was just thinking of you.
SaxophoneHero 12
Hey, he was just being careful. Pinkeye is very unpleasant.
WellThatSucked89 13
Haha. Silly boyfriend. Sorry for his, for lack of a better phrase, re-dick-ulous assumption.
ryanthecheeseguy 18
I hope he did get pink-dick.
Metallica36176 16
I favorited this FML because it made me laugh so hard... and then I had to read your ******* comment to make me lose it even more. xD
firstbasemaster 15
Pinkeye is very serious especially dick pinkeye
daniel_0084 14
Mr. 14 and single. How the hell do you know dick pink eye is a serious thing? Have you gotten pink dick before or are you just commenting shit to be disliked?
arroberts 10
What's worse is that his username is "firstbasemaster".
Goblin182 27
pink eye dick sounds like a grunge band
bdonalee97 6
Is your boyfriend stupid?
Wakachulak 22
Kinda obvious, ain' it?
Testing1234 25
Your boyfriend doesnt seem to know what he said?