Today, I received my first negative feedback on my otherwise flawless eBay record. The woman who bought the item said it wasn't as delicious as she was expecting, so there must be something wrong with it. What was I selling? A new and unopened lipstick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I received a letter from an eBay seller for whom I recently left an honest, negative review. I don't know what I was expecting, but I certainly wasn't ready for what spilled out coating my jeans, shoes, and brand new carpet: Glitter. FML
Today, a customer tried to return some pricey lingerie. She said she didn't have the packaging, but had never worn them. The skidmark I accidentally touched begged to differ. FML
Today, at my job in a cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like yours. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML
Today, the lip balms I ordered online finally arrived in the mail. After trying one out, my lips had an allergic reaction. It's a 4-pack. FML
Today, I brought a cupcake to school for my friend's birthday. After taking one bite, she exclaimed that it was the worst thing she had ever tasted and that we should sue the store that I bought it from. I baked it myself. FML
Today, I accidentally posted an extensive, negative review of the gynecologist I visited earlier this week. I messed up and posted it from my work's customer service email, so now it looks like the large, well-known company I work for had a poor gynecological experience. FML
Today, a lady stormed into the pharmacy I work at and chewed me out because the medicine I sold her the day before gave her horrible diarrhea as a "side effect". I checked, and it was the medicine she asked for - laxatives. FML
Today, I was shopping when a woman stopped me and asked me what lipgloss I was wearing because my lips looked gorgeous. I had to explain to her it was just the grease from the Slim Jim I had just eaten. FML
Today, I learned the horrifying implications of my memory not being what it used to be when I bought a tasty-looking chocolate bar, only to realize upon taking a bite that I'd bought one before and not liked it one bit. FML
Today, I sold yet another £100 bottle of lotion to a stuck-up teenage fashionista with less brain-power than the yapping bastard of a dog she carried in her arms. She did nothing but brag the whole time about her jewelry, and openly mocked me for only making minimum wage. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Tempest559 12
She must like to wear it on her teeth like my grandma does too.
daydreamer244 13
Well what flavor was it?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (150)
doglover569 0
What does she eat them? It's freakin lipstick...
boofgall 16
Flavored chapstick/lipgloss > lipstick.
eeppiicc 8
The pink tastes the best and it's cheaper than going out to eat.
NomNomMuffin 5
New My Strange Addiction?
kandi_kid69 15
Lipstick is so delicious though.
norotors 16
People are idiots.
lonkite101 14
Facepalm :~>
doglover569 0
I guess all the people that thumbed me down agree that yes, lipstick IS meant for eating!
StanSmith_fml 9
I'm pretty sure they thumbed you down for your god awful grammar.
truth_spitta 0
20- already a MSA lol it's creepy af lol
disneydraeer 10
No bud, just no.
MrBrightside21 20
Probably that one badass beat-boxer from YouTube. Wheeeeere's the chapstick?
coolbrony12 3
That was kind of the thing that made this an FML
ucoolgirl31 20
Who buys lipstick off of eBay...
nursestudent 5
Who SELLS lipstick on eBay?
doglover569 0
77- I don't understand my "god awful grammar" I forgot a comma after 'What' and an apostrophe after 'freakin'.. Oh no alert the elders.
realSlimjimShady 7
^ "What does she eat them" was probly the problem
dsbs 9
Did you know women consume about 4 pounds of lipstick in their lifetime? Don't ask me how I know this.
wlddog 14
Why do you have the inside of a rotary motor as a profile pic? Are you an engineer? Am I a nerd for knowing what is?
daydreamer244 13
Well what flavor was it?
SecretMe00 5
Insane in the Membrane
NathanAtWar 4
Delicious
Truth_Nazi 0
Considering most lipstick contains fish scales...
Calyx_fml 22
Feces.
whyusofat 17
First lipstick then bath salts, everyone get your frying pans stuffs gonna go down.
OneLittleAdditio 9
sorry OP but you can always leave an explanation under her negative feedback as to why she did it.
JFAW 6
I hate eBay buyers, they're always so damn needy.
AsianCookie247 14
So you're saying you're NOT supposed to eat them?! Who knew..
Il_Maestro 6
I apologize. In the future, I will taste test all of my cosmetics for sale on the Internet to ensure the highest quality taste.
MerrikBarbarian 9
I think if anyone reads the feedback they will be confused too and dismiss it anyways.
ChuckNorrisBeard 0
I have lost all faith in society...
alyshasocool 8
Really now? Because of one ebay user who didn't find a lipstick "delicious" enough, you lost faith in the society?
therealslim 15
The statement was perhaps a little exaggerated, I agree. But it was funny.
AsianCookie247 14
4 - It took you until you find out someone tried to eat lipstick for you to lose faith in this society? I lost faith after Justin Bieber, 16 & Pregnant, Jersey Shore's Snooki, 12 year old girls looking like prostitutes, and, what put the cherry on top of this disaster sundae, a recently reported cannabalism attack.
ALpein 0
Three cannibal reports. :< I should know, I like here.
AsianCookie247 14
^ yes, there are more than one. You're correct.
sirpantselot 22
4- I appreciate your comedic understatement. Funny stuff
syki 22
I hope it doesn't negatively colour the opinions of your future customers...
elidine 0
Ic what u did thar
BulldogHoops 14
66 I'm not a grammar nazi but that was disgraceful. "thar"? *facepalm*
Angel157 8
66- what does that even say?? Some people need to go back to 1st grade!!!
Tempest559 12
She must like to wear it on her teeth like my grandma does too.
nadnerbz 6
Wait, you're not supposed to eat lipstick?
mavverick12 0
U can eat it actually using ur ass xD.
Lil_Red777 21
#10+comment= dumbass
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Lipstick actually contains fish scales, strangely enough.
Unicornszxcvb 6
I've always thought it was a nutritious alternative to lipgloss.
BulldogHoops 14
10: Humor. You're doing it wrong.
perdix 31
YDI for trying to palm off skunky-tasting lipstick on an unsuspecting public! I collect Chap-Stiks and great flavors really make the difference. Junior Mint flavor rocks!
kandi_kid69 15
Chapstick? Pfft! Try lipgloss. The skittle flavor tastes best. ;)
perdix 31
I'm a dude, and a straight one at that. Lipgloss is off-limits to me. There are some great lip balm (really Chap-Stik is just one brand of lip balm) flavors like orange creamsicle, coconut and Dr Pepper.
unknown_user5566 27
I love the Dr. Pepper flavored lip balm :) The only problem I have with the flavored kind is that I continously just lick my lips, and my lips end up never getting moisturized, haha.
Revan501 15
They have Dr.Pepper flavor Chap-Stiks! Where may I find one?
perdix 31
Sorry your lips aren't getting mousturized, but if it's any consolation, the thought of you continuously licking your lips makes me all squishy inside ;)
unknown_user5566 27
73- I'd check Walmart or Walgreens, I've found them there before. 75- Oh boy! *blushes* :)
Revan501 15
Why thanks.
mjmsmommy89 0
FYI Lipstick isn't supposed to taste like anything like Chapstick is. Since you don't wear it (and we're thankful for that) you wouldn't know.
False_Stupidity 42
Now if only they made bacon flavored lipstick, then even I would consider wearing it...
RogueWarrior869 23
Go to thinkgeek.com They have bacon chapstick there. =D As well as other yummy bacon products, including soap! Edit: I'm sorry! I misread your comment as chapstick. I still recommend it, though.^^;
anythingmustbe 18
Pff typical you want to buy some nice tasty lipstick to eat and when you get it its simply not up to standard. So much false descriptions on ebay these days
RabidBunny 10
She must have thought it was a push pop...mmm push pops! :D