Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 18 year-old son learned that just because his girlfriend was on top doesn't mean gravity will prevent her from becoming pregnant. FML
Today, I went with my son to a conference about sexual education at his high school. I guess it was all too late, because among the attendees I saw three girls from the same high school who were already pregnant. They aren't even 18. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. I also found out I have an STD. I was clean before we dated. FML
Today, my girlfriend told her parents that she's pregnant. We have never even come close to having sex, but she told them I'm the father. Not only is my girlfriend cheating on me, but her father now wants me dead. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Today, my youngest, the 17 year-old, told me she’s pregnant. That makes it official: despite all my warnings about safe sex, all three of my daughters got pregnant before the age of 18. FML
Today, I took my transfer student, who I am hosting for her year of study in America, to the doctor. It turns out that she is pregnant, and my teenage son is the father. FML
Today, I picked my 12-year-old daughter up from school after her first sexual education lecture. She burst into tears on the way home explaining her fears of being pregnant with her boyfriend's child. As if that doesn't sound bad enough, I've met her boyfriend before. He is imaginary. FML
Today, I told to my son that I'm pregnant. After I'd told him, he looked up and yelled, "Fuck this shit!" and walked out of the room. My son is nine years-old. FML
Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML
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Top comments
lilhellian 27
And he thought he was the father how?
B00M3R_S00N3R 11
Why do parents expect the school to do everything for them? It's not their job to teach your child about sex so YDI
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Comments (177)
HeadlessSparrow 20
That baby is Jesus! Since the son is a virgin..maybe the girl is too if he is the father... But that's terrible!
Old unused 13
How can the girl be a virgin if she's pregnant? I think you should sit down with somebody for the "Talk"
ise3 10
So much fail in these two comments.
capslockisgood 19
86 - Ever hear of that book called the Bible?
Old unused 13
After I re-read the comment I realized I overlooked the first sentence, sorry.
HeadlessSparrow 20
Nah But I bet the Bible is very imaginative
BobbieH 19
Why didn't you teach him directly when he was younger? If you teach them yourself you know what they've learned and were taught it with a personal view not a committee approved one. Your values may differ.
kianaaa32 17
He's 19 and he's never had "the sex talk" or has friends that talk about sex?
cherry72 13
ya that seems a little suspect...hmm. and no surfing the internet???
rokolodo 10
OMG, you're photogenic.
s15c 9
I never got the sex talk. I just figured crap out by doing exactly that- talking to friends and being on the Internet. I mean, my knowledge may not have been perfect when I was 11, but I'm pretty sure I've got the idea now…
MandySkittles 18
It's easier to blame the school for your son's lack of education than yourself. There's no excuse why you shouldn't have had the sex talk with your kid, especially when he's 19 years old now. YDI!
Kiki242 19
This confused the hell out of me at first. How does he not know about sex? That is is major fail.
annie_nk 23
Even though most schools teach sex ed, no parent should rely on that as an excuse not to give their kids "the talk".
iRod_Touch 8
He's 19, and thinks he's going to be a virgin father? I'm sorry, but YDI. Coming from someone who's been a parent since I was 18.
pkom96 5
He should have gotten that talk from you in middle school, but you're lucky.. He could have actually been the father.
pandalover69 26
The sex talk is your responsibility as a parent, not the schools. I'd say you deserve it but normally the ones that didn't get the sex talk are the ones that end up pregnant with STDs, at least your son knows how to keep it in his pants. It is however your fault that he didn't learn what sex was till he was 19. Don't rely on schools for everything.
ShyAnn29 15
Why would you say it's mostly those who don't have the sex talk who end up pregnant and get STDs? I doubt that is true, anyone can get an STD, like for an example, some studies show that 1 in 5 people have Herpes.
ShyAnn29 15
Why am I getting thumbed down?
swick25 22
people don't like to hear the truth. that is why you're getting thumbed down. I thumbed you up.
perdix 31
Are you sure he knows what "virgin" means for a guy? Maybe he hasn't taken it up the butt yet?