Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my daughter ran up to me and gave me a cup. She said it was lemonade that she made with her friend. When I took a sip, she giggled and ran back to her room. It was not lemonade. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
Today, I went to a frozen yogurt stand with my dad. One of the flavors was called "Juicy Cherry." I had to stand there and watch in horror as he told the woman running the stand all about how he'd like to taste her juicy cherry. FML
Today, my 12-year-old daughter informed me that she is eager to lose her virginity, "Because I don't want to be thrown into a volcano!" FML
Today, my daughter asked me to take her to Victoria's Secret so I could buy her some "sexy clothes". She's 9. FML
Today, I was telling my teenage daughter about the effects from alcohol, and how she should not give in to peer pressure. While talking, I noticed that she was looking at me funny. There was a wine glass in my hand. FML
Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML
Today, my mother and I went to Wal-Mart to buy pads. I suggested I get tampons instead, so that I can go swimming at my boyfriend's cottage. My mother then goes to the nearest store employee and asks, "excuse me, if my daughter uses a tampon, does that mean she is no longer a virgin?" FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not a virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", Honey. FML
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Top comments
Sir_ND_Pity 35
1 - Yes, yes she did :)
iLike2Teabag 27
Don't pretend like any other generation didn't do their share of questionable things.
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Comments (361)
Jorcar 8
Minus 10 points for Humanity.
BeefyMeaty 8
A parent's worst nightmare.... 0_o
amifaiyaz 12
She's not a genius either, really.
amifaiyaz 12
What the hell kind of dad would advise that for his kid?
Shade1982 21
I'm not sure you read it right. What do you think he advised his daughter?
lolstruck 4
I know ten year olds who have had sex. I'm sixteen, I have never had sex, nor do I plan to soon, but I honestly don't think past generations were getting pregnant nearly as much as we are at 13 or having sex by age 10. It's just not right.
cookie07_fml 5
bitch.....what the ****
ilikepie22313 5
I wasn't at 13 either..lol
JoseIsAdork 31
wow, would not want to be in your shoes op! hope she just used the wrong word thinking it meant something else!!
Derpface10 2
Please tell me she thought virgin meant you don't eat meat, cuz i thought the same at an earlier age.
Uri69 10
Owned xD