Today, It was my birthday and my friends came to celebrate it. My parents thought it would be funny to give me a vibrator in front of everybody. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend bought me a vibrator for my birthday. Sounds sweet, right? Then he invited my 10/14-year-old cousins to our house. They surprised me in my room. While I was using it. FML
Today, it was my birthday. But instead of a decent surprise, my friends decided to smash a cake on my face and unhook my dress, while taking a video of it. In a public shopping mall. FML
Today, it was my birthday, and my wife gave me a sex toy for self-masturbation. She even showed me how to properly use it so I can masturbate myself. FML
Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML
Today, I celebrated my 21st birthday. My boyfriend of almost 3 years gave me a big pink vibrator. Thinking it was a joke I said: "I won't need this as long as I have you!" His reply: "That's what I wanted to talk to you about." FML
Today, as a birthday present, my friends threw a surprise party for me. I was so surprised, I pissed myself in front of everyone, including my crush. FML
Today, my boyfriend's friends were throwing him a surprise birthday party. I thought it'd be funny to get him some fuzzy handcuffs and a box of condoms as a gift. They never told me they invited his parents. FML
Today, my friends threw me a surprise birthday party. I was genuinely surprised—and also genuinely hungover from celebrating my birthday alone the night before because they'd all told me they were busy. FML
Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML
Today, it's my birthday, and I was going over to my friend's house for dinner. When I walked in, everyone yelled, "Surprise!" and then turned on the lights. When my friend looked over at me, she said, "Wrong person guys, turn off the lights." FML
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Top comments
nickinak2010 4
they were right, it is funny.
capnbzarr 43
Yes, they were right; that's hilarious. For my friend's 18th birthday, I gave him porno. His mom thought it was a lot funnier than he did.
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Comments (122)
nikki9tails 3
Some parents are not that awesome or open about it be grateful and atleast they didnt forget like most fmls on here lol
redtigerlily 5
Yeah I bet you still use it though.
IceyJustin 1
Well everyone loves boners, especially battery operated ones.
ktdad07 0
So I take it your friends weren't the only ones
ktdad07 0
If these phones were really so smart, they'd realize when I accidentally hit the send button as opposed to when I'm actually finished with my comment. Let's try this again: So I take it your friends weren't the only ones who came that day, right?
rhartwick 0
I see what you did there.
krez 20
You know what I got for my birthday? Oh, it was a banner ******* year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." Alright? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay?
prettypinkpixie 9
One of my favorite movies ever.
CP1988 0
At least it's not something you don't want
insanesna1l 0
yes I am sure that's what you meant :-p
wmsdubstep 6
Haha FYL.
blahblahblah5_x 13
..Your parents sure brought you up right :L
calihound 0
um no class mom and dad