Today, I was sitting in my room while my mom was talking to my uncle. I had my door open. She said, "Yeah my son doesn't know I have his phone password. Girls nowadays are real sluts." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized all of my boyfriend's and my dirty messages were being sent to my mom because I'd logged into messenger on her phone once without logging out. She sat me down and said, "I know your mouth's been on his wee wee." FML
Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML
Today, I skipped school and stayed home without telling my parents. My mom came home on her lunch break with another man, and had sex in our living room. I'm stuck in my room, listening to my mom cheat on my dad. FML
Today, I'm staying with my grandmother and overheard her having phone sex. FML
Today, I came home to find that my room had been ransacked. My mom comes out of nowhere and says that we need to have a talk. I freaked out thinking it was all the empty alcohol bottles under my bed. My mom holds up the birth control and says, "I always knew you were a whore." FML
Today, my mom came into my room to yell at me because she thought she heard me having sex, saying I'm too young for it. I'm 23 and I wasn't having sex. The noises were from my dad watching porn in the next room. FML
Today, my mom called me a slut after she found out I sleep naked. This is how desperate she is for any excuse to yell at me. FML
Today, I was sending some dirty texts to my boyfriend, when I heard a knocking sound coming through the wall. I sat there for ten minutes before I realized I was listening to my mom and her boyfriend having sex. FML
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done, and then I checked it out. My mom had posted on my Facebook, telling me that if I didn't keep it down, she was going to come up to my room. FML
Today, I was recording a video on Snapchat to send to one of my friends, while unaware that my father had walked in behind me. I was talking about how I can’t watch porn anymore because my phone is broken. He now knows too much. FML
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Top comments
JTthePurpleNinja 5
They're just jealous because you're getting some! :)
Epic_Fail911 15
your mom needs a boyfriend
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Comments (163)
KnucklesDeep 5
Tear your mother a new one for violating your privacy.
SadinSherman 16
Change your phone password
hartrum 0
sucks for u no more sextimg or phone sex lol
alival 12
I guess guys r too then!
alival 12
O and change ur password!
bizarre_ftw 22
Change it and if she confronts you say one of your friends figured it out, I promise you her response will be funny! Either that or get a girl to start sexting you but make it 10X worse than anything currently on your phone. Or have someone text you about drugs until she feels the need to call an intervention, then flip it on her and make it a "boundaries" and "privacy" intervention that she threw for herself. Just generally screw with her is what I'm saying
happychicka 0
That's hilarious!!! :D
JinxosGirl87 0
Depends on how old OP is that he's sexting with all these girls. I don't blame his mom for monitoring him if he's just a kid.
QueenSaru 28
If someone is young enough that their parent is monitoring their phone usage, sorry, but they shouldn't have a cell phone.
Whitewall_fml 2
Change your password.
DomoLaDii 8
lmao wow
ajalan 4
Your mom didnt mean that, all girls aren't *****, just the ones you talk to.