Today, I burned myself while cooking, so I asked my mom to get the burn cream while I waited in the kitchen. While I was waiting, I absentmindedly set my hand on the hot stove, earning myself a second burn. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML
Today, I got home from the hospital after I burned my hand. Why? I dropped my phone in the pot while stirring hot soup, and I reached in to get it. FML
Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML
Today, I was pouring boiling water into a cup, and I accidentally spilled it all over my hand. My mother responded by slapping me for getting water everywhere. My hand is scorched red, but thanks, I love you too, mother. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I accidentally touched a hot pan and, like any normal person would, jerked my hand back. My mom saw, yelled at me for being a "prissy princess" and then proceeded to stick her whole hand on the hot pan for a full 5 seconds. FML
Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML
Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML
Today, I sliced a deep gash into my thumb while carving up bagels. After putting a plaster on, I returned to my room to relax, where I lit a candle. The flame from my new lighter shot up, and set fire to the plaster on my thumb. Now I have a cut AND several burns. FML
Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the neck while she was cooking on the stove. Apparently I scared her and now I have a nice burn mark on my head from the hot frying pan she hit me with. FML
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Top comments
fadingaway 17
YDI. Getting burned should teach you to be careful around stoves.
FYLDeep 26
You're stupid. You should have had water running over that burn to prevent it from getting worse. You should only apply burn cream after that. You shouldn't have been patiently waiting by the stove at least.
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Comments (53)
kill3rs 0
sry bid FYL
PuppiesFTW 5
"You got burned by a stove!!!" "oh no it di'in't" (i don't know how to spell it the way people say it)
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
Second degree BURN!!!
AZMarine 0
"Burn" looks like bum !!!!
MrCatman1125 2
At least you getting the burn ointment?
adamo_erebus 26
Natural selection at work.
fadingaway 17
YDI. Getting burned should teach you to be careful around stoves.
Lythiaren 8
I agree. Once bitten, twice shy. I guess in this case, it's more like "Once bitten, stick hand back in mouth while waiting for mommy to kiss it better."
GreatGeak 8
well spoken 15. when I get burned I don't run for burn cream...I just grit my teeth and move on. ...unless the burn requires a doctor, then I ask mommy to call an ambulance for me, cause I don't know their numba.
talb1 7
The number is 911
papazhu 0
you have bum cream in your house :o
DreBeezy 9
No, they have mayonnaise for whenever someone gets a burn.
FYLDeep 26
You're stupid. You should have had water running over that burn to prevent it from getting worse. You should only apply burn cream after that. You shouldn't have been patiently waiting by the stove at least.
KristinaKreme 0
I completely degree. OP totally deserves it for being uncautious and stupid =_=
SpicyDuck 22
I was told that you shouldn't use burn cream at least until the next day or the blister will form under your skin or something /:
robc32ca 4
rotflmao. on the iPhone burn cream and bum cream look almost the same. maybe I should put my glasses on...
KFCkoolaidWaterm 0
Did you also absentmindedly put your foot in the oven? Or stick your head in the microwave? You set yourself up for that.
perdix 31
That's why teh womenses stay in da kitchens and da mens set on the couch and wait for da sammiches to come out.
Doortje 30
I was waiting for a comment like that. It's a little disappointing that it's coming from you Perdix, but not really surprising considering how desperate you are for attention.
ImaginaryFoe 1
How do you fail to miss the obvious sarcasm?
sweet_candy_ 17
op is a guy.
Doortje 30
I didn't actually, I just think that joke isn't funny, even with the added sarcasm.
Driveshaft 5
I found it high-larious!
furburger 0
You got burned at least 3 times by my count. You also burned yourself by putting up this FML and expecting any sympathy. FYI: Probably not a good idea for you to run around the house with scissors in your hand.
mrahhhhh 21
Ahh, poor little mama's boy couldn't bother to look for the burn cream himself or ask his momma where it was. He had to wait in the kitchen because of his horrible injury. And don't say you couldn't reach it. I almost guarantee you that you're taller than yo mama. If you're my height (and I'm barely above average), yo mama would be perfectly at your crotch level if she was on her knees, as we found out last night. I also used my telekinesis to move the stove near your hand and give you a second burn once I found out what a wimp you are. It's called tough love, and as your new daddy expect a lot more of it. ... Wow, that FML brought out the worst in me. For the rest of you, I love you all! :).
kiwi00 0
Maybe he's a midget?... or has a freakishly tall mom?
ChefGuy 0
that's awesomeness! lol
FredsterTwister 0
YDI your mom wasn't in the kitchen.
justbigbs 6
Props for you being in the kitchen helping out, but please for your own sake don't go to Hell's Kitchen. I think ice helps helps, get aloe and vitamin E.