Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML
Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML
Today, I was on my way to work and wearing a tank top when I suddenly walked through 10 feet of sprinklers and got completely soaked. A cop flagged me down in front of a bunch of people, because apparently I matched the description of a "suspect". He stared at my boobs the entire time. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I had to point out the "no shirt, no shoes, no service" sign at my work to an extremely old, seemingly intoxicated man wearing an ill fitting speedo. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML
Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML
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Top comments
yesio12 13
don't drop the soap!
dbjb40 0
sucks for you next time don't where speedos there nasty
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Comments (247)
EricJ 3
If I saw a guy walking down the street on a hot day wearing a Speedo and carrying a towel, I wouldn't think that he was a prostitute. I'd think he was going to a pool or returning from a pool. Did you have a towel?
omfg_usuckatlife 0
YDI for wearing a speedo. that's just gross.
shadowsbane 0
YDI for wearing a speedo in Arizona. Seriously dude?
HawaiianHottie 0
29,49,166... you are all effing hot... :D
saunder 0
anybody wearing a speedo should be arrested...
needsagf14 12
don't wear speedo. it's awkwardly tight
Danceswithsmurfs 0
think about it this way... if they thought you were a prostitute you must be pretty good looking
B4DR0M4NC3 0
lmao wow you must look hot
Darthbane2007 19
So you didn't put any swim trunks on after you left the pool?
kieran247 0