Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML
A shooting waiting to happen
Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML
Speedo Gonzalez
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML
Summer's here and the time is right…
Today, I was on my way to work and wearing a tank top when I suddenly walked through 10 feet of sprinklers and got completely soaked. A cop flagged me down in front of a bunch of people, because apparently I matched the description of a "suspect". He stared at my boobs the entire time. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I had to point out the "no shirt, no shoes, no service" sign at my work to an extremely old, seemingly intoxicated man wearing an ill fitting speedo. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML
Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML
Top comments
yesio12 13
don't drop the soap!
dbjb40 0
sucks for you next time don't where speedos there nasty
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Comments (247)
Rape_Dungeon 0
Don't get raped
vollyball921 0
I liv in AZ TOOOOO tht sux for u :p the cops out here are racist dicks if u ask me :p
PineappleEspress 0
Someone is going to be a boyfriend.
Rape_Dungeon 0
They are only racist if you are Mexican. Sherriff joe shows no mercy
LoganBballin16 0
that's what u get for puttin that on to start with! epic fail on ur part!
goldfishdragon91 0
u must have looked *****-able....... ha ha ha...
twist_of_fame93 0
this seems somewhat outrageous mixed with hilarious if you ask me
AtRoCiiOuSsS 0
LMAO @ #9
solecism 0
why? why? why?!
blindyblonde13 0
uhm op no one wears speedo's i dont blame the cops, if they didnt catch ya im sure the fashion police from 'what not to wear' on TLC would come getcha.. hahaha BAD BOY BAD BOY WHATCHA GUNNA DO WHATCHA GUNNA DO WHEN THEY COME FOR YOU BAD BOY BAD BOY!
twist_of_fame93 0
epic win #9
jade567 0
;( I'm going to have nightmares about speedos and fat guys added together. :& yuck.
jadedwaitress 0
Why would you walk home in a speedo? YDI for thinking it's acceptable to walk around on the street like that. Not everyone wants to know what your junk is shaped like
RaIeigh 0
#19 - You look just like Christopher Mintz-Plasse, bruh. But you probably hear that a lot.
gutzzzz 0
YDI, for even owning a speedo, should be punishable by death!!!
givants 0
a speedo dude??? come on board shorts are a must in a public pool bro. ydi
Ms_Jessie22 8
Maybe OPs a swimmer? I have lots of guy friends that are swimmers and they have to wear speedos. Still doesn't explain why he walked home in just that... o_O
LexaDear 0
I'm assuming you are Hispanic. I hate these stupid new laws. Arizona sucks now.
Daerauko 0
they couldn't arrest him for anything. unless there was money discussed and changing hands the OP could have been a real prostitute and still not been able to be charged
cooluc 0
Ah, the ignorance here never fails to amuse me. Go to eastern, or even central, Europe, and swim trunks are rare and everyone wears speedos.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Don't drop the soap!
Nena713 0
Why didn't you have another set of clothes? At least a towel..
LexaDear 0
SOTY, I was thinking that too! haha
blindyblonde13 0
wait how are you poasting this from jail? unless 4 hours later youre home and still in the speedo simply because you enjoy it... o.O
blindyblonde13 0
nevermind i read it wronng(: my bad
Nylecroc 0
47 and don't buy liquid soap... it takes longer to pick up
romskiies 0
no no no nyle liquid soap is lube for the bigger guys so that's a def no no lmao
StoryOfTheYear 15
Lol otherwise you'll have more than Big Bubba up your ass by the time you get it all xD
Ms_Jessie22 8
Omfg! Nylecroc and Romskiies your comments just made me gag. "Lube for the bigger guys?!" Lmao that reminds me of that Will Arnett movie. Let's Go to Prison!
sammiller4 3
I was on my way to arizona and the security ppl at the airport decided to do a body search on me... I was wearing shorts and a tank top and yet they decided to feel up my legs anyway
romskiies 0
that's why if you have liquid soap your asking. for the big guys to bust trains lmao
Ms_Jessie22 8
Oh no I got it. Really. Even some mental images. Ew.
Nylecroc 0
my comment didn't show up!!!! DAMAGE!!! @Rom haha I didn't think of it that way @SOTY "we're not talking about flux capaciters, we're talking about a butt's capacity!" hahah
romskiies 0
well i'd say it's off to bed for this old guy, seein as I have work in alil under 6 hrs from now. kids stop thinking about dropping the soap, liquid soap, unless you plan on going to jail soon and that floats your boat lmfao jk deuces I'm outskiies :)
Ms_Jessie22 8
Wow thanks for ignoring me guys, I feel so loved :( *tear* G'night Romskiies! Sleep tight. PS you look like Aubrey Graham. :)
romskiies 0
comment was for y not think Jess lol whose Audrey whatever you said am?? lol
romskiies 0
is not just say I look like drake ??? lmao no here close ^ahaha
Nylecroc 0
Jess sorry for forgetting you! Well sorry for making you gag that joke was a bit bizarre hahaha funny though
Ms_Jessie22 8
Audrey Graham. He was on Degrassi and I think he's some nobody rapper now. I've seen him on like a 7-Up commercial. GOOGLE!
Ms_Jessie22 8
You should be sorry Nyle! You boys have no idea of how to treat a lady :P
samantha_durano 6
lmao #9 xD holy **** THAT made my day.
romskiies 0
I did Jess that's drake lmao so I went from looking like Chris brown to drake hmmm ??? ?_? wth? I barely look Mexican, people think I'm white lmao & and now I resemble famous black singers/rappers?? lmao
Ms_Jessie22 8
Oh well I don't know who Drake is. I'm not really in the loop.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Sam Is that your grandma next to you?
romskiies 0
drake is the that Audrey guy you mention and he's actually pretty famous now lol I like one or two of his songs but that's about it well time for dark knight and knocking out lol
StoryOfTheYear 15
^^^ Good nightskiis
Nylecroc 0
I don't know how to treat a lady F My L! haha at least I said sorry so it counts for something! haha 'nightskiies' good one well i'm out too Piece!
StoryOfTheYear 15
of pie? Adios son
shona_fml 0
Yes, but we're not in Europe, sir. We are in America, and in America, GRAPE SMUGGLERS are NOT acceptable unless you're a swimmer AND are at a meet!!!
Ms_Jessie22 8
Agreed with 94. Whoever invented speedos must have been a man that wanted to show off his junk. I for one find nothing attractive about them. On the contrary, I laugh every time I see someone wearing one. :)
Nena713 0
Haha Jess! romskiies looks nothing like chris brown or drake judging from his pic (although he is covering some of his face, I can kinda makeout what he looks like). And Rom you look Mexican to me, you remind me of a couple of people I know.
advent2060 4
sry but WTF does being hispanic have anything to do with this situation??? getting arreseted for walking around in nothing but a speedo in public is the OP's own dumb ass fault and has nothing do do with Arizona becoming more strict towards ILLEGAL immigration. and on that note the "new laws" u hate only affect ILLEGAL immigrants so if a person happens to be asked if they are legal citizens guess what? they have nothing to fear if they are in fact LEGAL citizens. and one other thing, the law doesn't target Hispanics it targets ANYONE who enters our country ILLEGALLY which is something our entire gov't already does Arizona just happens to be a little more stict about it so I'm sick and tired of people saying this is a law that discriminates against Hispanics.
advent2060 4
btw this is in response to what #44 - LexaDear said
PYLrulz 17
the only people allowed to wear speedos are Olympic swimmers and men who are built like pro wrestlers. Other than that, off limits, especially if you are a wrinkly old man, or some 300 pound walking lard butt
liveloveandownit 0
YDI for being a creeper wearing a speedo in public.
keysshooter1440 1
fake the cops cannot just arrest you for wearing a speedo thinking ur a hooker. 100% fake
chris_42 11
YDI for wearing a speedo.
ryguy997 0
ever heard of changing? or explaining?
skater847 0
5 shut up not all AZ cops are racist there are AZ cops that are Hispanic black and everything else.
shawnsand06 0
well idk about Arizona but here in Texas I had a friend who I know for a fact isn't a prostitute an he was arrested for jaywalking and suspected prostitution. he made it on the news for a couple of days. we need to wake up as a society and rise up against the screwed up government that we have in our great nation!
Skimbap 0
Yeah, just do the american thing and shoot people 'till you get what you want.
hXcsoccerplaya 0
5 that has absolutely nothing to do with the FML. go back to Mexico if you can't think through a simple story. OP- why would you walk home in a speedo? seems kind of stupid to me unless you live REALLY close
hooah33 0
don't drop the soap big hommie
sashatlhs 0
at least it wasn't like borat's speedo...
megiscool123 0
you shouldve put a towel over yourself or something op
M4V3R1CKR13 0
fake and gay the police cant arrest u like that they need proof
FyourLIFEdotCOM8 0
there not racist. they are just racial profiling totally fine. and why the **** would you walk home Ina speedo?? yeah it's 100 degrees but put some ******* shorts on.
arxtizrage2010 0
YDI for wearing a speedo
ymainel 2
blonde moment. we understand.
maralexa 0
98- very well put.. I agree 100% with you and am tired of people obsessing over how terrible it is. i don't think people understand it's about ILLEGALS, not about race.
comedychick 1
eew why a speedo in the first place?
yodavader3 0
dumb ****. posting?
omfg_usuckatlife 0
yeah in EUROPE! not in friggin ARIZONA! oh the ignorance...
Tadeusz_fml 5
It is not okay to wear speedos anywhere. Think of your future children. and my eyes. Also, I find it ironic that a country of immigrants with a population density of 44/km has decided that it is now too late to join. Would you turn away your great-grandparents from your country?
Rokstarr 0
haha that's why I wear trunks. ydi for wearing a speedo XD jkjk ydi and fyl haha
Oreohugzpenny 4
Why wear a speedo? Don't those things make guys feel sqwished all up in there?
hahism 0
budgie smugglers
branflakes95 0
Before= • after= O
southwind 0
Friends don't let friends wear speedos. Ever. Period.
MrsDruidess 23
finally some dudes getting harassed for being indecent in public! ;-) and OP, by some real swim trunks, no one wants to see that. . . ever!
eams_fml 9
Well, they're from USA, and that isn't a thing outside of Australia.
dbjb40 0
sucks for you next time don't where speedos there nasty
truthmonster 0
exactly YDI for wearing a speedo in a public pool
jwing 0
they're*** haha, wow.
emmyjones567 5
and *wear... learn to spell
HolyPotato 9
Weeellll , it was really bothering me as well..
summerguy97 16
Jesus Christ the comment have huge time gaps.
aleyp63 13
yeh ikr.. really huge time gaps~
Patlipo 14
Ya
Rynardhell 20
I got this year covered up.
trippydoll 4
:p
Lord_Vader 0
dang you looked all dolled up you got a hella nice look
PaintTheStars 2
Ydi for wearing speedos. especialy if u are fat.
RawrImaDragon 18
I don't like speedos on anyone...
yesio12 13
don't drop the soap!
josephstockton 0
I bet you felt safe in there. next time bring cloths to change in.
yarbles 3
so how's your asshole then? Hah!
sarawwh 0
hehehe
nerdsgetmehot 23
I'm guessing you're leaving out a small detail. Did you stop to dance in aforementioned speedo at every corner?
RaIeigh 0
Hah, "small" detail :] Puns are so much fun, but I don't think you meant that as one :P
ilikepie789 0
15 is hot
OMGJASMiNE 0
yea she is(:
OMGJASMiNE 0
not in thee wierdo way(: I mean she's pretty aha
RaIeigh 0
Jas, you do tell a lot of chicks they're pretty on here. Humm, I'm getting suspicious :]
OMGJASMiNE 0
haha im just nice!(:
damyb13 0
jas is pretty though. love your eye make up ^__^
OMGJASMiNE 0
thanks(:
beachgirl332 0
i dont believe she is hot. just a flat **** trying to make her boobs look bigger. she only posed like that to get a reaction out of somebody.
beachgirl332 0
i was talkin bout 15.
zyth 4
and you're a fatnerd who just fapped to her picture
nerdsgetmehot 23
#121 First off, I'm not a ****. Don't judge someone from one picture. Second of all, yeah-- my boobs are small. So what? I'm not too bothered by it, but I wasn't trying to pose to make my boobs look bigger. Also, it's a little cocky to judge someone when you don't even have a picture up.
jeskadrea 0
#120 that was nasty and uncalled for. aggressive much? and I don't see any sluttines on 15. I've seen a lot more skin elswhere on FML. somebody has some anger and confidence issues...
CrazyDutch 0
you suck... your just a ugly bitter **** I hate your kind
foxychik10704 17
Ha she looks 11
ForeverRealTx 0
i bet some fudge got packed in that motha fuka haha
pariah13 0
^nice.
LoganBballin16 0
Jas and # 15 are both very preatty girls drop it lol