Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML
Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML
Today, I was on my way to work and wearing a tank top when I suddenly walked through 10 feet of sprinklers and got completely soaked. A cop flagged me down in front of a bunch of people, because apparently I matched the description of a "suspect". He stared at my boobs the entire time. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I had to point out the "no shirt, no shoes, no service" sign at my work to an extremely old, seemingly intoxicated man wearing an ill fitting speedo. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML
Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML
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Top comments
yesio12 13
don't drop the soap!
dbjb40 0
sucks for you next time don't where speedos there nasty
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Comments (247)
SynysterNero 20
It sucks you had to deal with that but at the same time you should have had clothes to change into after you finished swimming.
noobienick 19
I hit both because it isn't illegal to wear speedos, so they had no right to arrest you. However, speedos are disgusting and should never be worn.
worldclassrager 41
Didn't you bring a towel? And how did you walk there without the same conviction?
xxsakuraxx 29
You deserve it for wearing a speedo. I don't care how attractive you think you are. Nobody wants to see your junk.
potatomassacre 14
Put some clothes on before you leave
katarina111 2
Aaaand that's why you don't wear a speedo
punxsy_phil 11
I bet you made a lot of new friends Op
fourscore 10
Better to be mistaken for a prostitute by the cops than by any interested customers.
MIlkquasy 3
No you weren't.