Today, I was mistaken for a male prostitute because I was walking home while wearing my speedo after a swim in the public pool. I was arrested and had to stay in a room full of convicts for 4 hours. Still in a speedo. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in a hot tub at a public sauna. After chatting with a friendly couple, I decided to go get some lunch. I was halfway out of the water when the man started laughing and said he'd thought I was a woman. I am. FML
Today, I was once again mistaken for an escaped convict. I live near a women's correctional facility and apparently my nursing scrubs look a lot like their prisoners' uniforms. The cop made me late for work. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML
Today, I was on my way to work and wearing a tank top when I suddenly walked through 10 feet of sprinklers and got completely soaked. A cop flagged me down in front of a bunch of people, because apparently I matched the description of a "suspect". He stared at my boobs the entire time. FML
Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I had to point out the "no shirt, no shoes, no service" sign at my work to an extremely old, seemingly intoxicated man wearing an ill fitting speedo. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML
Today, I went out on my back patio at night to skinny dip. I live on the intracoastal, and as I was walking towards my pool, the police were doing a random search. From a boat with a spotlight. At least their whistles told me they liked the birthday suit I had on. FML
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Top comments
yesio12 13
don't drop the soap!
dbjb40 0
sucks for you next time don't where speedos there nasty
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Comments (247)
Norther 1
YDI for wearing speedos. I hate how they gotta show that they have a fu*kin penis!
angel55033 12
umm yea that's public exposure why would you walk home without you're clothes gross
biebette16 0
PLZ tell me ur hot!
kuntz507 0
that teaches you to wear clothes when in public
AFuckinCrocodile 6
That's sexy!
mrssuarez2011 12
I was a competitive swimmer for 12years and I understand the speeding thing, that's actually really normal but walking home with ONLY a speeding on? Hmm that's a call out for attention. No enough to deserve going to jail but still.
nailpolishCF 4
how is this fair? party rock anthem guys get stared at, cuz they r sexy and they know it. but u get thrown into jail? hahah
fistnazal 10
I call bullshiiiiiiiit
AndyAutopsy 11
Oh my, I feel bad for those poor convicts! No man should ever wear a speedo, ever. EVER.
Drewx77 11
If you hear "Lets play red rover" don't play it, It'll lead into "Bend over red rover i'm coming over".