Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML
Today, I discovered that my 15 year old girl had hidden a disgusting porn film in the "future career" folder. FML
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in tenth grade. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML
Today, I found my daughter's fanfiction account. I need a new pair of eyes, or brain bleach, or both. FML
Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML
Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML
Today, I attempted to snoop around my daughter’s room, because I suspect her of having sex with her boyfriend behind my back. Hoping to find the evidence, I went to her room as soon as she left for school. Turns out she rigged her bedroom door. With glitter. Uh oh. FML
Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML
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Top comments
limeyemilyy 0
Rewrite some of it to freak her out
zcheema17 0
Lol! Don't go snoop around her stuff! But that is weird...
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Comments (480)
NoahEibon 11
She likes Twilight so she is a freak
ChangMu 8
It's rude to snoop, but damn, you're right.
devourerofbooks 10
YDI for letting her read/watch that mind numbing bullshit. Sad when even a movie's own actors/actresses hate what they're doing. Robert Patterson didn't even want to meet Meyers.
LaUruguaya 11
Um, you don't know what you're talking about...Robert has defended the series and fans and got along well with Stephenie.
devourerofbooks 10
Not from what I read a while back when the movie first came out. Either way it's still terrible.
MissKrissy 5
The movies were shit, the books were awesome. The actors and director corrupt movie ruined twilight series for me forever.
LaUruguaya 11
Well if you read it somewhere it MUST be true!
LaUruguaya 11
Zomg, a teenage girl wrote down a fantasy!! Stop the presses, it's the end of the world!!!! Seriously, get the **** over it. Before Twilight it was boy bands, before them it was Leonardo DiCaprio, teenage guess ALWAYS have these obsessions. The twilight bashing is old.
jooliaboolia 6
it may be weird but you shouldn't call your daughter a freak. you should love her no matter what and just wait for the twilight fad to pass.
Giants24 0
i found that on my gf's laptop everytime there was an edward i changed it to Megan Fox and every Jacob i changed to my name.
locster3000 3
Damn...
suitgirl5 5
I love how everyone says he's a horrid parent for calling his kid a freak....cause none of us ever call our parents assholes or worse...
rubberducky5609 3
My mom calls me those names all the time! xD
suitgirl5 5
LOL mine did too when I was younger and I called her more mean things than I remember...she also snooped through my stuff but now that I'm older and not an angsty 16 year old I know she did it to make sure I stayed on the right track. Sorry but with the Internet these days you never know, you hear about kids putting up nude pics that are 15/16 years old and the parents had no clue...better to be overinvolved than nothing.
sammsaballerr 1
at least its not a story about her actually having sex. YDI asshole give your kid some damn privacy.
JakkRabbit 0
it's just writing. So what? There's a lot of sexual fan fictions out there.