Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML
Today, I discovered that my 15 year old girl had hidden a disgusting porn film in the "future career" folder. FML
Today, my mom found a book of dirty stories I'd written in tenth grade. She then told me that I wrote about things she'd never even thought about, and she's been having sex for years. If that wasn't bad enough, she's taken them in to work to show people. FML
Today, after waiting for years for my oldest daughter to grow out of Twilight, my younger daughter discovered it. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML
Today, I found my daughter's fanfiction account. I need a new pair of eyes, or brain bleach, or both. FML
Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML
Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML
Today, I attempted to snoop around my daughter’s room, because I suspect her of having sex with her boyfriend behind my back. Hoping to find the evidence, I went to her room as soon as she left for school. Turns out she rigged her bedroom door. With glitter. Uh oh. FML
Today, I noticed my hidden porn folder on my laptop had been renamed to "LOL". I live with my teenage daughter, and no one else. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
limeyemilyy 0
Rewrite some of it to freak her out
zcheema17 0
Lol! Don't go snoop around her stuff! But that is weird...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (480)
grtkt 1
Ah don't be so dramatic "I can't even look her in the eyes". I know Twilight's a horrific story, but come on!!! Grow up! She isn't the only person in the whole world who does that, and sure it's normal for girls her age to fantasise about stuff like that. Don't make such a big deal over nothing!!
27alli 0
Your kind of a terrible parent. Raising someone who would do that, then invading her privacy, and then actually all of it (you creep), then calling her freak and embarrassing her on the Internet...
Wynthos 2
The solution to this problem is quite simple. Kill the daughter before it can cause any further damage to this world.
Molly_Amanda 11
This just made my life xDDDDDDD
krutch408 2
She's your ******* daughter be a real parent and deal with it. I'm sure your moms thinking the same thing about you
stro88 6
Sounds like the girl who got her "lips" bit by her bf ahaha.
daydreamer244 13
omg u should write something on it she will go nuts?
PawsUp_fml 2
Uh you are a bad parent. She is sixteen and maybe erotic writing of that kind is enjoyable to her. Don't call her weird because I bet you and a lot of other people are freaks also.
MissArizona 4
Well, that sucks.
psycho456 0
Not really that weird. Horrible parent. Ydi