Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML
Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
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Top comments
CitizenSnipz 0
Both of you were eating a delicious snack filled with cream. He was just seeing how it was for you!
doctorr_fml 9
that blows
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Comments (219)
whitneyyy16 9
apparently you suck at giving head. sucks for you!
kydancinlady7 0
Haha, wow.
jlamb523 0
he must have been hungry
tiedwithsmiles 0
lmfaoooo omg
skoe 0
hahaha that's hilarious! Watch some ****, learn some things and try try again.. hopefully next time you won't fail
buttshapedfruit 0
lmao pwned! hahahaha
Fridgen28 0
Dont worry about it next time just rub a Twinkie on his dick instead lol
millz2995 0
u must really suck
daneeyoll 0
no the Twinkie mustve been that good
RuralNinja 0
That sucks but its probably the funniest thing I've read in a long time.