Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "Eat it, eat it!" FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML
Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blowjob. I was laying in between his legs because it's just more comfortable. I looked down, and he had pieces of toilet paper sticking out of his butt cheeks. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. Soon, I noticed he was being very quiet. When I looked up, he was in a deep sleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML
Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
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Top comments
CitizenSnipz 0
Both of you were eating a delicious snack filled with cream. He was just seeing how it was for you!
doctorr_fml 9
that blows
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Comments (219)
xvxblackdahlia 0
hhehe. that reminds me of last month.... so much fun :p. hilarious
dbjoe3 0
hey you and your bf have something in common, you both like cream in your mouth.
sexychick129 0
soreeee butt i woulda took that twinkie, bit it in half and been lyke "dis iz wat ima do tha nextt tyme u askk 4 some pleasure,"
Calculate900 4
That was the funniest thing I've read all night. I'd expect this to appear in a commercial or something.
min_candy 0
AHAH definitely. you should be the ingenious future commercial creator
Hello_Zombie 0
maybe he's gay?
SemperFichus 0
I'm pretty sure there was an FML comment that said something like "when you're g/f decides to give you a ******* it's not a good idea to be eating a twinkie when she tries to look up at you sexily"
SweetSilence13 0
Head and Twinkies? At the same time? Where do I sign up?!
sporie 0
bitch got a attitude!! shut up and continue !!!
danielleeycakes 3
lmao.!! xD I could so totally see my boyfriend doing that.1
ReequelNinja 0
epic fail lol that made me crack up