Anonymous
Clermont, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
sexyfreak2510
South Africa
Today, at my bachelorette party, I got so wasted, I ended up giving my stripper a lap dance because he "wasn't doing it properly". There's photos. FML
Cpt Colin
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Get out of here
Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML
Anonymous
Groningen, Netherlands
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML
SCARRED
Kansas City, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I walked in on my dad giving my mom a striptease. FML
Anonymous
Madison, United States
Today, I was at the bar. A man started to hit on me. He claims to have a fetish for pregnant women. I'm not pregnant. FML
ShayisPay101
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Life goals
Today, my daughter told me she wants to be a stripper when she grows up, just like "Daddy's girlfriend." We're still married. FML
baron
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Big B
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I was at the strip club. I put my dollar on the stage. When the stripper came over to take it, she stood me up and flipped my tits and said I had bigger ones than her. I'm a guy. FML
dreamisugly
🌶️ Spicy
Rookie mistake
Today, I found out the girl I lost my virginity to during prom night is pregnant with my kid. FML
kte
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I found out that my parents bought a stripper pole, my mom even hired a stripper to teach her some "moves." I'm scared to go in their room now. FML
Top comments
cameronman9 2
Does this pregnant stripper happen to be your wife?
comedybreak 20
This is why safe sex is important Guys, learn. But seriously OP it's your fault for letting her
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Comments (249)
FrankHotpants 31
We all have preferences, I enjoy a lap dance when the stripper is crying.
DaGrimRetard 8
"OH god my water just broke!"
RedPillSucks 33
So..... Was she pregnant when she started the dance, champ? Give a new meaning to "Me love you long time".
GetTheFuckOut 7
Lol. Why is Mr. Luvinmalife's comment so disliked? Everyone knows they would have said the same damn thing if they were in that situation. Come on, now.
tom526 10
Wouldn't bother me. Wouldn't be my first choice, but I would still take it.
chuckleswk 0
Did the dance get wet towards the end?
jwbfml 11
Please tell my wife to come home.
puppypie67 0
Beggars can't be choosers!
Enjyu 0
I'm kinda jealous
wildone123 6
No worry I'm the one that gots in her pussy but I'm sexy so the baby will have my sexy ass looks bitches