Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML
Today, while I was brushing my teeth, my 5 year old-son walked into the bathroom. He gave me a mean look and said, "That's Sammy's toothbrush, not yours." I've been brushing my teeth with the dog's toothbrush for two months now. FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML
Today, I had to clean up after the kid who discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML
Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML
Today, I walked in the bathroom and smelled a disgusting cheesy smell. I looked at the tub and my boyfriend was furiously scrubbing under his toenails with a nail brush. FML
Today, my brother came out of the shower and sat with my mom and me on the couch. He then says he liked the idea of the extra toothbrush in the shower, it helps him clean between his toes. I have been using that to brush my teeth for the last two weeks. FML
Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML
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Top comments
killuhand 12
can't blame the kid for wanting to be minty fresh
feldco1 17
At least this didnt say "my toothbrush."
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Comments (128)
Ikeaknomehunter 9
It's the best way to get a good scrub around it, more agile than a sponge
Jemm_fml 29
Was it YOUR toothbrush? God I hope not.
Dipmunch 13
He's gonna need some mouthwash. I mean, peniswash.
Enslaved 38
He was just trying to get it in-- mint condition for his girlfriend first. Who needs Altoids when he can freshen up her breath curiously strong another way. :P
jw90 18
Next he'll be combing his pubic hairs.
kinky44 28
That small, huh?
James_is_Mexican 25
I hope it was his toothbrush...
allie2590 31
Well goodbye breakfast...
benmec 18
Clean clean scrub scrub. Peel back the foreskin. Repeat.
Not_Impressed13 9
I hope it was his girlfriend's toothbrush. ;)