Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML
Today, while I was brushing my teeth, my 5 year old-son walked into the bathroom. He gave me a mean look and said, "That's Sammy's toothbrush, not yours." I've been brushing my teeth with the dog's toothbrush for two months now. FML
Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML
Today, I had to clean up after the kid who discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML
Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML
Today, I walked in the bathroom and smelled a disgusting cheesy smell. I looked at the tub and my boyfriend was furiously scrubbing under his toenails with a nail brush. FML
Today, my brother came out of the shower and sat with my mom and me on the couch. He then says he liked the idea of the extra toothbrush in the shower, it helps him clean between his toes. I have been using that to brush my teeth for the last two weeks. FML
Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML
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Top comments
killuhand 12
can't blame the kid for wanting to be minty fresh
feldco1 17
At least this didnt say "my toothbrush."
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Comments (128)
chris4u2nv5 19
You can never be to thorough. Plus its the best way to prevent penis cavities.
darwinism 30
If he gets too tired using a manual toothbrush, have him move to an electric one that does 7500 rpm. When he masters that and if he still feels dirty down there, a sonic toothbrush at 30000 rpm is the way to go.
RedPillSucks 33
I hesitate to ask how you would know this.
sk1tt135 22
Talk about rubbing it raw. X_x.
Welshite 40
That mental image was...vile.
ForkymeetsPorky 15
Scrub-a-Dub-Dub not in the tub. But gross. Eugh!
starile 20
How else do you expect him to fight against plaque and gingivitis down there? Make sure he used dental floss, too.
carecow 16
You'll be able to use this story to your advantage when he gets older.
Pwn17 25
Just that image in my mind... O.o
Ziggy122 15
Was it YOUR toothbrush?
ciumegu 6
Was he using toothpaste?
jrock9093 18
At least he's cleaning it, to bad you'll have bad breath today! No but really that's disgusting good fml