Today, I tried to get my wife to have sex with me, she told me she couldn't because she had her period. She's two months pregnant. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, my wife actually had the balls to tell me that we can't have sex for the rest of her nine month pregnancy, because according to her, "I don't want twins." FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce and walked out. This is two days after she informed me that she is unexpectedly pregnant. FML
Today, my coworker is two months pregnant. I used condoms with her every time, so I’m not sure how the fuck it happened. I’m the only man she’s been with. I tried to give her money for an abortion but she insists on keeping it. She knows damn well I have a real wife and kids, and I can’t afford to lose them. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
Today, my wife told me that when she was actually pregnant with her ex's child; she was insatiably horny and always wanted sex. Too bad for me, because the current pregnancy has made her repulsed by any sexual contact. Thanks for telling me, I guess. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML
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Top comments
Wheredidgrungego 12
She just didn't want the baby to be poked by your ****.
blueocean43 2
Some women keep having periods when they are pregnant, maybe she is one of them.
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Comments (427)
bellatrix4 0
Isn't is bad for the baby to have sex during pregnancy?
aleithiera 2
You know, you CAN have a period while pregnant, right?
bellatrix4 0
And I lie just as much as my brother, doesn't matter what gender we both lie. Who came up with this stupid argument anyway?
dansco 25
YDI for been with such a stupid idiot! And I hope your kid takes after you lol
1randomchick 2
Ok, WOW... First of all.. how can the baby be 8 months old, when she is only currently 2 months pregnant? Second.. lets just all agree that every woman is different,she may actually have her period/she may not. EITHER WAY, she should be giving head.. ;) Third.. Stop the sexism, it's pointless. Lastly, wtf are you doing complaining on here about not getting sex?? You don't know what it feels like to be pregnant. In reality, you should get off your computer and give your wife some cuddles!!
karitaki945 0
ur not supposed to have sex with a chick when' she prego u **** tard
Amber33 0
It is medically possible to have a period while prego, rare but possible.
melisa_hope 9
it is not common but possible for a woman to have her period while pregnant.
snowtigress 5
either she's lying or you ain't gonna be a dad anytime soon
mesocrazy 2
for the millionth time for the ignorant folk: the bleeding a pregnant woman may have is NOT a period. a period is a specific event referring to the shedding of the uterine lining when the body is getting rid of an UNFERTILIZED egg. so, a period can only happen when a woman is NOT pregnant. geez. it isn't that hard, people. and like someone else mentioned, the withdrawal bleed you get while on the pill isn't a menstrual period, either.