Today, I realized that my fiancé only touches me when he wants to have sex. Any other contact is purely accidental. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
This is wrong on so many levels
Today, I noticed my new boyfriend barely touches me casually, unless I initiate, and even then he’ll pull away fairly quickly. Apparently his dad told him about "fake rape accusations", even from women you’re dating, so he’s scared to touch me now. FML
Serves no purpose
Today, I realized that the only time my boyfriend is physically affectionate with me is when he wants to have sex. When I suggested we just cuddle, he looked at me and said, "What’s the point in that?" FML
The bobs and vagene guy
Today, ever since I let my boyfriend touch my boobs, he thinks it's appropriate to grope me whenever he feels like it. Even talking to him about it doesn't seem to stop him. FML
Basic Instinct
Today, I told my husband that it makes me feel unattractive and undesirable that I’m the only one to ever initiate intimacy. Not just sex, but also basic affection like hugging and kissing. His response? "Oh." FML
Not again
Today, I realized just how clingy my boyfriend is, when he pulled out in the middle of sex, lay down and hugged me, and said in his "adorable" voice that he didn't really want to have sex, but cuddle. I wouldn't mind if it didn't happen so often. FML
Effective
Today, I realized my boyfriend uses sex as a way to get me to stop talking. FML
Just once
Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML
Today, I realized that my boyfriend will only have sex with me if I am on my stomach and not revealing my face. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, I noticed that my long distance boyfriend of almost four months only calls me to have phone sex. FML
Top comments
Omg_its_Chloe 6
Can't touch this lol. Sorry, had to :)
LeapOfFaith 8
Break up with him and say it was purely accidental.
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Comments (189)
eastsidesoldier 7
Lol that sux
ppeanutbutter 1
No shit sherlock
HetaliaFreak 10
This was such an incredible comment. Tell me, how much thought did you have to put into this?
marinus_fml 20
#1 Just like your comment. Ohhh burn..
MineIsBigger 5
thats the way it is with me and my wife. we touch each other all the time...
lebronesque73091 12
Just let him know that you want to be touched/held more. Communication is a very important in any relationship.
skata 4
39- you just had to let us all know that didn't you?
McDonaldsworker 4
Hmm I wonder what kind of "touching" OP meant?
SquiffMomma 1
Snuggling, cuddling, a stray hand on the back, things like that.
McDonaldsworker 4
Hey thanks #138 Silly me I thought OP was talking about like sex or something lol
SignUpisntcool 3
Huh
chillyCholo 5
Is that a question or a statement?
thisiscat 14
Brilliant comment my good sir. The combination of those three simple letters, pure genius! Leaving the comment without a question mark or a period to leave us guessing what your trying to say, you must be born with genetics of the great philosophers.
DrDilllonReese 12
33- the level of sarcasm emanating from your comment is through the roof. Well done.
zack11742 7
33 you're comment made my day
BostonBruinsFan 8
33-Hi cat
immaMonsta 8
#33 You're* #47 Your*.
Omg_its_Chloe 6
Can't touch this lol. Sorry, had to :)
thisiscat 14
At least he doesn't touch you too much.
WorldRallyXtreme 9
stop! Hammer time!
xFluttershy 7
What a jerk! If it's like that then whenever he touches you, just assume it was accidental and he doesn't want sex:)
adropofpeace 8
Too much? In a healthy relationship there is no "too much". I let my man touch as much as he wants. Too much. Kids these days.
Groucho_fml 5
The hammer is my penis.
niznor99 6
155 is the new standard for all women. Get on her level. Jkjkjk But seriously, get on her level.
Xotoolyxo 16
Y r u engaged then ?
rocker_chick105 31
Y r u tlking lik dis?
allard 14
The question is, why are you?
BostonBruinsFan 8
It may be a guy...I'm talking about OP
irishman1989 0
Who gives a shit about how he spells. It's a good question. There's no reason for her to be engaged to the guy then. Damn you people are retarded and get way off topic. Ready to jump down someone throat if the don't spell the way you want them to. Move on.
panda_lover_27 0
Lmao that does suck
gloopyone 4
Obviously it "sucks" the OP already told us they have sex.
bacon1043 3
Both of you.. No.
BostonBruinsFan 8
…hhhhmmmmm…BACON!
LeapOfFaith 8
Break up with him and say it was purely accidental.
BostonBruinsFan 8
OP might be a Guy!
Harpy20 24
Unless they're in New York, reread the ******* fml.
Troll_spray 6
Yea great idea, dump his ass op thats the best way to solve the problem.
oohshinycolors 0
if you do it over text, you could say it was an autocorrect :)
DeboDaGreat 3
Thats messed up. But who doesn't like sex?
contedefees 11
You can like sex and like other forms of intimacy. Like most people.
rocker_chick105 31
He could be worse, and not tell you when he wants to have sex, then get mad for you not knowing when he wants to
d3sigN8t3dDruNk 1
Kind of like how girls are with everything else? ????
BostonBruinsFan 8
12-OP might be a guy…There are homos sadly...
cruisinslow 4
You sir deserve an award
irishman1989 0
Are you retarded. You must be a failure in every relationship you have.
BostonBruinsFan 8
Currently, I've had a gf that is hot, sexy, and won't leave at all...I'm only 13...Me:100 You:-50. I win!!
BostonBruinsFan 8
Btw, wtf it modded my comment, I forget wat I wrote..
soccerguy2 11
if you want to be touched then just have constant sex. win-win
phantumgrey 6
Winning!!!!
honeybuncher 3
well at least there's some contact!