Today, I realized that I am dating a 25 year-old man-child. He turns 13 whenever he sees my boobs, complete with big eyes and saying "honk honk" whenever he touches them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out the 28-year-old I am dating is actually 48. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who's a bit older than me, introduced me to his daughter. I was expecting a toddler. Nope, she's a year older than me. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, meeting his family for the first time. I was leaning against him when he reached around, grabbed my boobs, and started making "pew-pew" laser noises, all in front of his family. I can't believe I'm dating this child. FML
Today, a cute new guy I always run into at work hit on me. Turns out he's only 18. I'm old enough to be his mom. FML
Today, the boy that I met online six months ago and expressed my love to sent me a picture of himself and confessed how old he really was: thirteen. I'm eighteen years old and holding a steady job. FML
Today, I found out that my 20-year-old boyfriend won't touch my boobs because he is afraid his parents will find out. FML
Today, I found out that the girl I've been dating online for over three months is actually a very bored 14-year-old boy. FML
Today, I regret ever deciding to ask out a younger man. I’m 27 and he’s 21. I’m worried about my career, he’s worried about his Xbox; I love my parents, he’s still rebelling against his like an emo teenager; I want romance, he likes to wobble my breasts while giggling, saying, “Boobies.” FML
Today, my little brother grabbed my boobs and wouldn't let go until I pried his hands off. When I told my mom, her response was, "Get over it. He's a little kid who doesn't know any better." He's 14 years-old. FML
Today, after an argument, my boyfriend called me a fart knocker and gave me a wedgie. Apparently, I'm dating an 10-year-old. FML
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Top comments
Starfire22 5
Mostmen are man-children at heart, it never changes. Accept it and it will make life alot easier.
Sixpakastan 0
Gonna need to see said boobs before I can pass judgement.
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Comments (353)
sarcdude 3
Come on, let the guy play around.
Silentknight 0
I like what "unregistered" said, at the beginning of the thread. props on pointing out sexism. however... WTF is wrong with being autistic? you will be hearing from my lawyers. good day sir. I said good day! *storms out of the room* *barges back in* forgot my hat! GOOD DAY!!
bexox 0
I agree with you. What people do with their bodies is a personal decision that doesn't affect these commenters here. I wish people would stop acting like teens having sex is going to bring about the end of the world.
jessxoxo28 5
girl, its time to get a man. dump his ass
Ninjaface 0
Okay, I'll admit that the honking is a little on the immature side. You need to teach him how to motorboat you like a REAL man!
His_Phoenix 0
heeheee....."Boobs are the only thing that make a 2-year-old child and 50-year-old man act the same way." --Bill Engvall At least he likes them...
brideprincess 0
Honey, they're ALL man-children!! My 48-year old husband is just the same, and no, he's not a Walmart reject!!! LOL!!! Anyway, it's just the way they are. The sooner you accept that all men are immature, the sooner you'll find true happiness by accepting them as they are, and loving them anyway. I've loved my fella for 15-years now! Good luck!!
TheOtherNewest1 6
I don't see the problem. You have an awesome gift. Use it to your advantage, and quit whining. Men like *******. Welcome to the facts of life.
aliasxaq 0
Wow, he got to second base. Score!
Hybrid351 1
God DAMN it I have had it up to HERE with these Twilight FMLs