Today, my boyfriend, who's a bit older than me, introduced me to his daughter. I was expecting a toddler. Nope, she's a year older than me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was introduced to my dad's girlfriend of six months. I've already heard them sleeping together several times, and seen her car pull away early in the morning. After meeting face to face, I also learned that she's only two years older than me. FML
Today, I realized the guy I've been hooking up with has a daughter who is a year younger than me. As if that wasn't bad enough, I also found out she had a child of her own. I've been hooking up with a grandpa. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of six years has a five year-old daughter. FML
Today, my daughter got engaged. Her fiancé is not only 25 years older than her, but was her teacher in middle school. FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She greeted us holding a baby, and I told her how cute her son was. She told me that it was her grandson. Turns out my boyfriend is the father. We're 16. FML
Today, I was introduced to the girl my current boyfriend went out with while dating me. FML
Today, I found out that when my mum had introduced me to her boyfriend, it was right before his birthday, so she'd rounded his age up. For two years I thought he was seven and a half years older than me, when really he's actually six and a half years older. FML
Today, I found out the boyfriend of 2 years is actually 22 years-old instead of the 28 that he told me. I'm turning 39 this year and I'm very pregnant. FML
Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son told me that he and his new girlfriend are deeply in love and are meant for each other. The "girlfriend" in question? My fiancé's 12-year old daughter. FML
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Top comments
aksteve 4
And you're still trying to convince yourself he's only "a bit older"?
Rexx 0
how does that even work out?
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Comments (201)
Rexx 0
how does that even work out?
humorizer 14
Quite simple. Let's make believe the OP is "X" years old. Now, X+1.75 years ago, the OP's boyfriend had intercourse with a woman. That intercourse from X+1.75 years ago led to the creation of a beautiful little girl. 1 year after the birth of the lil girl, the OP's parents also had intercourse with each other. .75 years later (i.e. 9 months) another beautiful girl was born. A few years later, this new girl met the dude who was mentioned in part one. They became bf/gf. X years after her birth, the OP decided to write this FML, where you asked me to explain how it worked out. With that said, good night.
Moemoemoe_fml 0
#6 win.
Drakon_fml 7
And people said you'd never need Algebra after school. You deserve a pat on the back, my friend.
l2izwan 0
Very nice #6, very nice.
What_the_hell321 0
Awesome
Antivirus_fml 0
You Win!
MagicMeds 0
How is that win? It's extraordinarily basic, and not very funny...
youKnowBetter 0
It's funny BECAUSE it's basic. It was a simple answer to, what the person before them thought was, a complicated question.
aero_fml 0
Win
purple5 0
Yeah, I didn't find it that funny either.
HookEmTexas07 0
Actually, that math would make OP's bf's daughter (d) 1.75 years older than OP. What must have happened is that .25 years after d was born, OP's parents conceived OP and then .75 years later, OP woud have been born. Thus .25 + .75 would equal 1 year, to make OP 1 year younger than d.
HookEmTexas07 0
Actually, that math would make OP's bf's daughter (d) 1.75 years older than OP. What must have happened is that .25 years after d was born, OP's parents conceived OP and then .75 years later, OP would have been born. Thus .25 + .75 would equal 1 year, to make OP 1 year younger than d.
HookEmTexas07 0
Actually, that math would make OP's bf's daughter (d) 1.75 years older than OP. What must have happened is that .25 years after d was born, OP's parents conceived OP and then .75 years later, OP would have been born. Thus .25 + .75 would equal 1 year, to make OP 1 year younger than d.
HookEmTexas07 0
Oh shit, triple post...feel free to bury the repeats.
kaleid0scopeEyes 0
That doesn't explain the age of the boyfriend, and HookEmTexas is right, the math is wrong...lmao at all the people saying "AWESOME". all you need to say was .25 years after daughter was born the OP was conceived, and born .75 years later.
brutallyhonest24 0
now when you say a bit you mean like 15 or 20 years right?
humorizer 14
Awww rats, my math probably was wrong after all. Forgive me, for I had returned from a final, and it was about 3 am my time. lol
GuitarJunkie6258 0
Now if only 1.75 year olds could ejaculate your story would be flawless.
goatboy197 0
good job #6!
thafuck 0
#6 a little to much time on your hands :)
Gimmedat 0
nice boomer picture guitarfreak!
kissMyAsss_fml 0
We can always leave it at, " one year older. "
kkbanks 0
nice #6 u shld b a scientist! ;)
mitchiv13 0
does it matter??? either way it's ****** up
dlbliner 0
or, he married a divorced woman, then divorced her, still being in contact with his daughter.
m1j3 0
haha I didn't understand algebra then and I font get it in number 6 post lol
BahahahLOL 0
Date his daughter
tribridags 0
bit older....40 years older...
cerulean_rules 2
Agree with 109. Unless your boyfriend had a child in elementary or middle school, he'd have to be at least 14 years older than you, which means when he was in high school, you were a baby. That's more than a few years :P.
courtsx 0
I was just thinking that. Spitters creep me out in the second one! The jaw...
Crlnprz 11
#136 i hate boomers.
ezekielisbeast 0
You my friend are awesome.
Awesome_Guy2468 0
U just blew my fuking mind number 6
Luxord33 8
Da **** did I just read...?
seacadet 18
Maths make my brain go ow!
source_confirmed 2
At first I thought the same thing, but I think when OP says a bit older it actually means much older with the expression,
dharmaint 15
Exactly
Vectrik 9
I realize I'm almost six years too late but please it's late don't do this to me
iamazombie 0
wow thats just a little weird...
YayAmerica 0
Agreed. My step-mother is in her mid-thirties and she LOVES being Grandma to my niece. When people ask her how she's old enough to be a Grandma, she always tells them "That's what happens when you marry old people." OP married an old man and now she suffers the consequences.
sadistmonkey 19
no she didn't....see above: "boyfriend"
aksteve 4
And you're still trying to convince yourself he's only "a bit older"?
Starfire22 5
Win!
Sun_Kissed18 25
Yeah, a bit doesn't seem to cover it.
maplebaby 0
yeah, he'd have to be more than a decade older than you, 15 years at least. You're dating a guy 15-20 years older than you, be prepared for nasty surprises.
ZleveL 0
3 your pic scared the shit out of me
spenceroone3 0
WTF at pic?
jobiff 0
wow, did they change the definition of "bit"?
Ravenzin 2
Yeah just a "bit"? A lot of bit.
kitkatkelly 0
Many bits older!
T_X_P 2
How is this an FML? You chose to date a much older guy and are faced with a corresponding circumstance. So what?
YayAmerica 0
Oh, YAY. Here comes the "It's an FML because..." discussion from the moderators. Thank you. We haven't had enough of that.
LilaBear 2
#16 = win
Psychs7 11
Isn't the purpose of the posts to discuss whether it's a fml or not and why?
dudeitsdanny 10
Yes. But they come in when you say it's neither an FML nor a YDI and post a response sometimes. This, however, is a YDI.
Squadoosh 0
So if you call him daddy, he actually could be your dad. You must be really really young if he is "a bit" older.
powersticks 16
YDI for dating someone "a bit" older than you. Also you fail at English because a bit and a lot are two enitrely different things.
luckyducky123 0
Win.
geovanni 9
he would have to be at least 16 years older
Monkeybuttorama 0
Theoretically he could be as little as 9 years older then her.. unlikely, yes, but possible. it all depends on when he hit puberty. Besides which, there's nothing wrong with dating someone older as long as you are of legal age yourself. My grandparents were 20 years apart, and they lived a very very happy life together. OP, you made the choice to date the guy knowing that he was able to have kids before you were born. If you weren't aware of this, you are either dumb, or don't know the guy as well as you thought. Also, you never thought to ask how old she was? Inconsiderate much?
Moemoemoe_fml 0
People, the guy could have had the daughter when he was way too young. 12 or 13 year old boys can accidentally get a girl pregnant, for example. Several years after this wtf incident, the guy has a daughter who's an adult despite not being that much younger than her dad, and he has also a gilrfriend who's just 13 or so years younger than him. That's not that much of a difference in the long run, and yet, she'll be in for a surprise when she meets the daughter. There you go.
YayAmerica 0
Yes, but this is pretty unlikely. Not a lot of people have babies at 12.
neonokku 0
unfortunately people do.
lovegod 0
very few people
lululatenight 28
You haven't met the guys at my school....