Today, I had to buy groceries while suffering horrible morning sickness. My nausea magnified as I stood in line behind an obese lady wearing a tank top and tiny short shorts. I lost everything in my stomach when she stuck her hand down her shorts and started scratching at her ass-crack. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my morning sickness got so bad that, while at the grocery store, I had to throw up in my purse. FML
Today, I went to the market and I was stuck in a long ass line for 10-15 minutes. To make things worse, in front of me was a guy bending down with his buttcrack all the way out. I couldn't eat anything after that. FML
Today, suffering from severe morning sickness followed by cravings for salty food, I had stacked our fridge with yummy snacks. When finally emerging from our bathroom after retching this morning, I found out my husband had eaten all my snacks the night before. FML
Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I'm pregnant, though I don't really suffer from morning sickness. I do however suffer from sympathy puking, which kicked in with horrifying consequences when someone burst in and started vomiting in one of the other stalls. FML
Today, while grocery shopping, I was having such terrible abdominal pains I could hardly walk. As I'm 8 months pregnant, I told my husband we should head home. He thought a better idea was to run through the store and hide from me, hoping to induce labor by making me chase him. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store with my boyfriend. I wasn't feeling well so I wasn't paying too much attention to his usual antics. Since he thought I was ignoring him, he decided to grab me roughly by the stomach to give me a hug. I ended up puking right in the middle of the aisle. FML
Today, I was shopping in a packed store when I started to feel faint. Since I was quite far along in the queue, I tried to hold out until I reached the front of the queue. Good news: I succeeded. Bad news: I then fainted at the counter, hit my nose, and shit myself. FML
Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML
Today, my husband and I were at the mall, and decided to have a snack at the food court. As we ate, an obese woman squeezed past our table, butt facing us. Just when her ass-cheeks slid past our heads, she let out a horrific fart that my father would be proud of. FML
Today, my morning sickness was so bad that I threw up everywhere, just from thinking about the pretend meal that a kid had made for me. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
alexhaz64 4
I don't think anyone would blame you for that, morning sickness or not...
ajnorma 16
That would do it for me too!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (170)
vbmg152 19
Gross! Had to be Walmart!
lexi365 20
Look at the bright side. Ummmmm. *spends 30 minutes trying to think of one* Ahah! Even through that mental image that will scar you for life, you have not killed yourself.
thatawkardone 2
Te he..... ass crack .
MyS3lf 24
Oh you poor thing! I would have too. I had 24/7 "morning" sickness for my whole first trimester. EVERYTHING made me throw up. I'm so sorry you had to witness something that would make ANYONE throw up. I recommend Emetrol and/or peppermint (Altoids work for me) as a nausea combatant. Both are more or less natural and perfectly safe. Unless you run into the previous scenario......no one is safe from that.
wifeyHo2011 1
Eww that's just not right . There should be a law for that
RealReality 12
I would probably have thrown up as well.
KiddNYC1O 22
What nebulas are those in your pic? I think I see the horse head on the left...
Shadow_Phantom 26
Aww, someone beat me to the Wal-mart comment. But just... oh god... FYL.
Dcm210 19
hopefully your feeling better.
malfanese 6
I'm down Noor, as long as the obese woman isn't there... *shiver*
brittanywashere 14
I just threw up. Ewwww. I feel for you since you had to actually see that. I'm assuming you were at WalMart? Lol