Lonely
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I fell asleep while masturbating. I'm so bad that I bore myself. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Today, my hand fell asleep while I was masturbating. My own body rejected me. FML
44haley44
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML
hannahthedino
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Involuntary
Today, my friend spent the night. I now know that she masturbates in her sleep. FML
Sleepy head
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I fell asleep while my boyfriend and I were having sex. What's worse is that he didn't even notice. FML
Lonely Wanker
🌶️ Spicy
Cranking
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML
pornhastaughtmenothing
Tacoma, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I realized just how bad I am in bed when my girlfriend literally yawned the words, "Oh God" while attempting to fake an orgasm. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Can't be bothered
Today, I realised just how lazy I am when I was about to masturbate, but decided not to because I didn't want to put in the effort. FML
MyHeadHurts
Ireland 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML
exhausted without relief
🌶️ Spicy
Bang one out
Today, I’ve been so stressed out lately about my health and mounting bills that my insomnia has returned with vengeance. I thought I’d masturbate to help get some relief, but turns out I’m too tired to even do the deed. Too exhausted to release, but my brain still won’t let me sleep. FML
MrAries
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I'm so sleep-deprived, I got a boner from just thinking about falling asleep. FML
Top comments
spitfire35 3
At least better than falling asleep while having sex. Oh wait, for that you'd need to be having sex.
itouchguy360 3
maybe you were just tired?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (66)
jamrome918 0
#6 aha lmfao wow xd
flatbush 0
if you can do it let me help you out with your problem =D
kirakira333 0
lmfao at 33!! that just made my day... :D
DParamore 0
haha FAIL
racherose 0
"the stranger" haha I heard about that one from family guy XD
FortuneFaded 0
You should dump your hand and find a girlfriend/boyfriend.
hotboy977 0
lol #12
Spac3Ghost 0
ah my word, =) i laughed for a whole 5 minute straight!!!! SHAAAHAAAAAMMMME!!!! C= thats massive dick fail!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahahahahahahahaha 3 things... 1. this is the best made up FML EVERRRRRR 2. or 3. if this is real... i feel so so so soooooooooooo bad for you =) and i can show you with the amount and length of my hysterical laughing =)
M0NST3RMW3 0
i see what you did thar 43..
saladgirl123 0
i do it all the time lol. sumtimes i do it for the soul purpose of falling asleep.
powermad80 2
isn't this on that admitting to laziness decree on Holy Taco?