Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML
Today, I overheard my husband admitting that he doesn’t wash his hands after having diarrhea. I had no prior knowledge of this. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend doesn’t think it’s important to wipe after he poops. FML
Today, I explained to my man child of a boyfriend that we don't reuse dirty dishes. We have to wash them. He doesn't think it's gross and yelled at me, throwing the pan in the sink. Oh, he also refuses to wash dishes. FML
Today, I found out I'm the only one in my family to wash their hands after they use the bathroom. FML
Today, I found out that boyfriend doesn't think he needs to wipe his ass after he shits if he's going straight in the shower because he can just "clean it up in there". We share a loofah. FML
Today, my husband told me that he never washes his hands after using the bathroom because he thinks it's only for "paranoid people". FML
Today, I discovered my new boyfriend doesn’t have toilet paper. He has a toilet cloth, which he instructed me to rinse off in the toilet after I was done. FML
Today, my boyfriend informed me that he hasn't showered in over a week because he "doesn't like to be wet." FML
Today, I found out that my best friend doesn't wash her hands after going to the bathroom, even if she changes her pad. I then remembered all the times she's handed food to me, and teased me when I tried to wash my hands first. FML
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Top comments
smileycyrus 0
You put his dick in your mouth, it's okay.
Godfreyy 2
that's rather gross
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Comments (173)
NegativeFreak 0
well you have been face to face with it im sure ... i dont think it would be so short he would pee on his hands lol idk its your man and you would know ... im just saying lmao :P
tucansam555 3
so what I don't either unless im delaying at school
MsSoulReaper 27
Atleast he cooks and doesn't sit on the couch all day.
jdengel 0
maybe you should cook once in a while, lazy
anerudhan 0
you deserve it for not doing the duties associated with your gender
anerudhan 0
calm yourself
Barney_Rubble_75 0
just to confirm lalalady42, your account WILL be deleted within 24 hours. (moderator)
anerudhan 0
hey FML Team: **** YOU, I will continue "my juvenile sexism" you weird chimpanzee-******* bastards
Sonic_boomerang 5
He may have burnt the food had he washed, then you would have been pissed about that. lose lose situation here
saltycookies 5
you should learn your place and do the cooking
4XxXo_OxXx4 0
moderated for using "....overused jokes"? i dun think so
ramurrump 0
The real problem here is that YOUR not in the kitchen.
SpectSelf 0
that's where all the extra flavor comes from. he adds some dingleberry spice to give the food life.
Pshhyah 7
Thaaaaat's delicious and sanitary.